the marshmallow memories

envy

2009-08-31T18:20:00.009+08:00

27th aug'09 thursday

did a flight with my batch mate val!! omg!!! haha..then after that went back..it was a great time together..this was my 2nd time flying with her..the very first time was when she was a normal crew, going for her recurrent soon..if i'm not wrong, it was with juvelyn(cic), her and someone i've forgotten..i remembered that it was CNY eve...haha...that was the first...then after that, it was the last time i flew with her liao...now it's her as a CIC woots..lols..i do hope i can fly with her again!!! haha...wheee....

28th aug'09 friday

it was sby for me...didn't get called which was good...met val later in the evening to go party world...but ended up it closed down la..at the cuppage plaza..sian...so we walked to cine kbox lor..lols..omg la, on the way up the escalator, i saw amelia ah jie and linda..linda so slim lor...

first 2 pictures were ah jie the bottom is linda...omg la...you saw how skinny she is now...lols...then we headed to kbox..sang our hearts out..it was a last minute decision...val damn suay, got called up for all the flights...so no choice lor...haha..but i had a great time with her la...=p

29th aug'09 saturday

PARENTS ARE AT BANGKOK IN THE MORNING WHEN I LEFT HOUSE!! WHICH MEANS PARTY AND NOT SNEAKING OUT!! WOOTS!!!

did 4sectors with naj and feona afterwhich i headed down to my all time favourite,POWERHOUSE!! hee...it was a blast!! while on my way back on the bus, i was calling winnie and so happen that she can club..like finally after that incident and the other time where i got called up for sby...haha..and i still thought that day was a sunday till feona asked me, you can still party after flight..i was like erm...no it's sunday how to party..lols...it was just so last minute..went with becky too =D haha...tell you lor, i slept kinda late cuz' the night before, kbox till kinda late then i slept at 4am..no rest then pia down to PH straight after work..pro man!!! lols...was really shag after clubbing lols..

met becky first and her friend jonathan then to meet winnie and the rest...zann came with his friend jay too...we got watinni's husband to sign us in..though zahryn was there with watinni but they didn't join us..went to ph cuz' jon was 18 so he can't get into boilers...so went in to put my bag, hit the dance floor...it was super packed!! i was perspiring like mad like less than 10mins..decided to go to the toilet...ended up we can't head back cuz' it was too packed..i was like sian half..cuz' the music has just started...argh!!! we decided to rest at the exit and the link to boilers...we went to the ladies first la while the rest went to smoke..

camwhoring in the toilet hee...

cousin becky, me

winnie, me

she super sweet right =D

after that becky and i were sitting there waiting...saw gary there...it was a rare occassion la...haha..he was with his friend..he changed so much lor...he doesn't like loud music anymore...he prefers softer music...lols..then i contacted john...afterwhich both of the were talking on the phone...gary worked like shit la..being so busy attending to his customers and having so much viewing...then after that we went to boilers instead..lucky to smuggle jon in..zann and jay got us a table and we started drinking...the hennessy!! lols..i preferred the mixer to be green tea though...the rest had coke...i didn't like it la..lols...then that's where the music started..live band first..kinda boring but then the music was like getting better...started dancing lor..i think i'm the one like going crazy over there...lols..cuz our table's the only one that's dancing, the others were all above our age la...so they didn't really danced much la...i really drank too much and was super high i tell you lols..feeling was shiok..didn't really party till like that lor...lols...pictures below..

our table

front: jay, becky, jon, zan

back: me, winnie

i was already high..but it's weird that i didn't get red...

a perfect match =D

jay, me

after that my friend came to pick me up..with a fairlady man..it's my first time ever in a sports car..i know it's not something to brag about but yeah man, it's super cool la...omg omg!!! i'm so excited over it lor..haha...i was back safely...and it was so fast that i got home within like 10mins? the seats inside were sports kind, the gear box, the interior, the speedometer..and i always thought that fairlady was a 4 seater car, didn't expect it to be a 2 seater..OMG!! the experience in that car was superb i tell you!!! hee...the car was really powerful too =p haha...

30th aug'09

i was literally sleeping the whole day at home...slept at like 5am cuz' i was still on the phone with becky..got woken up by DD's call..i asked him to come over...he came then accompany me for awhile...brother went to buy lunch, i ate and then after DD left, i went back to sleep...i tell you, i was knocked out la..super shag lor..plus the alcohol that night...gosh...then sleep till dinner time, DD called..met him for dinner and went back...can't sleep liao lor..then decided to call becky..lols..she was out with ryan and their other cousin for steamboat...i really wished i can join but kinda too late la...talked lor...haha..after that slept la..cuz' next day was school..

31st aug'09

woots!! it was school day..i woke up at the correct time but went back to sleep and eventually woke up at 830am..bathed, had breakfast before heading to school...lols...then i came to realise that we're having a mid term test on wed...which i'm like OH SHIT...no doubt i paid attention in class, understood what's happening but ultimately, i'm still afraid..seriously, i don't like anything to do with maths...it's so unlike law and marketing where i don't even need to study to ace in that module...no doubt i've been skipping school but then, i still do revision at home...just hope i can pass la..this is my last module afterwhich we're free from studies and graduate woots!! hee...then we can have more off days and i can really utilize my staff travel liao..must go travel la...so friends, if you're reading this, when i jio you guys, don't reject ah...lols...cuz' next year may, my contract will be ending..i think i'll stop flying for the moment and look for other jobs first before going back to fly again..haha...i don't want to think so much first..by the time my bond's ending, i may have better offers...

my thoughts

i really wished that i can earn lots so my parents doesn't need to worry for us and they can relax...mum's resigning due to work pressure she got...no doubt her pay is so much better compared to the other jobs but yeah man, it's the pressure that she's getting insomnia...i wouldn't want that to happen to me either..it's not good...just hope after that, she'll find a much relaxed job..yeah...hmm...i really envy lotsa people..people who are around my age and becoming their own bosses, earning hell lotsa cash!!! while me, i'm still a part time student having a full time job with not so much of a good pay...which i can't even support myself let alone my family...no doubt i don't have to give my parents allowance but i still find that part of it should just go to them...perhaps they need it, i don't know...i've been trying to save a thousand every month the last time..i could..but now, with the little number of sectors we're having, i doubt it's possible..plus the pay i'm getting is so little...it's not even a 1.5K..saddening right? well, that's life for me as yet...but i've yet to find better paying jobs..hopefully to find a 3K paying job..so that i can pay for my car the next time i own one with my HARD EARNED MONEY..=D and i really hope i can give my parents $5o0 a month instead of the $100 a month i'm giving which i feel it's so pathetic...argh...i'll work harder towards my goal..those people whose around my age earning big bucks, i'll take flight from there...they are my aspirations from now...i know talk is cheap but i'm trying really hard now...jiayou melissa!!! you can do it!!!

the 4 years together

2009-08-26T15:11:00.010+08:00

25th aug'09
yesterday wasn't a good start...woke up and got all excited about the day..cuz' it was a special day...the day that we first got together =D haha...i got up, got all ready, went to bathe, prepare...lols..smsed DD that i woke up liao and he replied ok..did my make up, dressed and was ready to go...till DD smsed me and said he was in a bad mood =( i thought what had happened...must be about his dad or something...then, he called...he was crying...sighs..made my heart sank the moment i heard him cry...there were patches on his favourite belt...

met him at a later time but i was alright =D finally saw him on the bus =D his eyes were red...the look of him really is vulnerable =( heart really ached!!! then i tried to cheer him up...but i think i can't lols..cuz' he was still tearing...then we reached town..went to grab some donuts...then to catch this stupid show bruno!!!
it really sucked big time man...although there were some scenes that really made you laugh like hell...lols...but at the end of it all, i really have no idea what it was talking about...perhaps the part where bruno worked really hard and didn't give up..but it's all rubbish..more of a GAY show...after that we head to heeren, then to wisma then to ION and lastly to tangs where the suprise came...hee...

cuz' we were wasting time ma...i got a pair of wedges at m)phosis at ION haha..shopped for shoes AGAIN!!! lols..then at about 7pm, we headed to tangs..marriot hotel...i couldn't get to take pictures cuz' it was so high class and if i were to take a camera out, my, i may look like an idiot...lols..yeah, and it was the dinner buffet that DD's going to take me there..haha...what a great tactic to bring me first to the toilet there haha...dinner was great, food was ok..perhaps i'm having my period so i didn't really eat so much..haha...but i simply love the soups!! it was great!!! lols...especially the drunken prawns haha...the desserts were so much better la..compared to the food itself..lols...

the day was simple and i had enjoyed it totally!! it's a special day with lotsa love hee =D then we headed back...all the food was making us sleepy haha...went to his place to sit for awhile before heading home ma..haha..his dad left him the metal polish to polish his belt which the stains came off and my, he was really happy about it =D haha...then we sat in the living room to catch
命中注定我愛你 (fated to love you) haha..was really good la..accompany his mum too..then after the show ended, we head to his room for some pictures before he went for a bath =D haha..

when he was bathing, haha, i took out my camera and started camwhoring lols...woots!!! lols...

when he was back, i decided to take more pictures cuz' this was really too little...didn't take much when we're out though..so to make up for it, here are the rest hahahhahaa...

hee...i simply love this picture =D

26th aug' 09
today, my stupid alarm didn't ring...when i was up, it was 9am..no doubt i can still make it but by the time i wash up, get changed and stuff, it was more than that...i would probably reach like at 11am? sigh..missed school again and yeah, continue sleeping lor..was tired...i even cancelled the meet up with becky =( i just didn't feel well la...perhaps i ate too much last night and i'm feeling bloated..felt like puking but i can't...sigh..i must get vitagen to aid in my digestion liao...shall get it later...well, will be heading to DD's place later..but before that, i'll head to yew tee to do threading followed by to ntuc to get vitagen and then to his place =D he's having his IPPT today..i really hope he can give it his best shot and aim for a gold...that'll give him his $200 lols...jiayou!!!

school..

2009-08-24T22:34:00.003+08:00

woots..woke up at the correct time when my alarm is supposed to ring...i resetted it to a later time cuz' it was still early...guess what?? if it hadn't be DD, i think i'll still be sleeping..it was 9miss calls from him...thanks DD else i really will be sleeping and missing that much in school..

was sleeping in the bus while on the way there...my, i was really tired man...perhaps it was due to the first two days of all morning flights..sure shag and tired...reached school like at 10am?? lols..the lecturer was ok la..still singaporean...but then i still feel that a teacher should be professional not like him..sigh..i think so far, mr fred and mr kern can fit in the category of being the professional ones?? lols..the others all cannot make it la..

head back home and then i really knocked out lor...lols..was calling DD, he didn't answer so i supposed he must've slept liao..and i didn't want to wake him up..so yeah...let him continue his sleep cuz' later in the day i know he'll be tired...as he'll be working night shift...hmm..yeah then after that i went to bathe and sleep liao lor..lols..haha..woke up a little and then went back to sleep..was really tired la...i slept till 8plus then woke up to have dinner hee..i really can sleep!! lols..and best part, i'm still tired..haha..will be sleeping soon i guess haha..

can't wait for tomorrow!! our 4years together!! woots!!! muackz!!!

hmm..some serious thought about it..

2009-08-23T23:29:00.007+08:00

first thing's first...it was to wake up at 430am to get prepared..cuz' uncle robert's picking me up at 6am...got up, stone abit and then started to get ready...left my cell in my room cuz' i know i'll be busy preparing for flight ma...done with everything and went to check my cell...realised uncle called so called back...no answer...so yeah man...waited...then i smsed jie and let her know once uncle pick her up, drive to main road and i'll wait there..faster...

good crews today...ah jie, faizal & fizah..lols..it was a good flight till we met some irritating pax and some stupid capt la...argh!!!

152-smooth flight

153-stupid flight!!

this was what happened..pax wanted to get the shades right...kept insisting that he wants a VOID!! wth...we can't do the void cuz' there wasn't any defect on the shades la...just that the frame itself was too tightly screwed to the shades itself that made the lenses has that gap which apparently that pax called it a defect..omg la..argh!! whatever la...then ah jie told capt about it and guess what?? no doubt he said he'll be wanting to help..ended up he did nothing but just stood there greeting pax and not even listening to ah jie telling him the situation..wth!!! i was SUPER SHOCKED la!! cuz' he was really contradicting man!! the image of him was really RUINED la..always that he was a good capt cuz' he did some stuff other capts don't do...but no lor...sigh...why why why man?? he was running away from the problem and left ah jie to somewhat "DIE" alone there with that pax without helping at all la!! but bidding pax goodbye...wth...sigh...what a capt!!! what a hum ji capt man!!! and he kept telling ah jie not to be angry..while ah jie was there just getting an earful to that pax la...i was like omg...it was the first time ever i saw her hurling vulgarities man..and to keep bowing to that pax and kept apologising, that capt still didn't do anything but still treated that ah jie's issue with pax was like some kinda movie...let me see, the latest? G.I Joe?? lols...sigh..why man..put it so nicely but didn't even reach to us...he was kinda awkward knowing that he's doing something wrong...and also, ah jie can tell that FO doesn't like him that much man..argh!!! WHATEVER!!! even the FO was curious and wanting to help us but we couldn't tell him as yet cuz' ah jie was FR-ing down the whole incident...

woots, it was really a bad day!!! and lotsa flights were delayed...guess what...it was due to the bad weather in malaysia and they couldn't land...so we kept going in circles lols...but after all we landed on time la..haha..so not so bad =D

after flight, waited for ah jie to finish her FR..met P2 and then after that we went to MAC (again) for dinner...i've been having MAC for the past few days man..lols..so took train...we had this funny video..wait till P2 upload it in facebook then =D you shall have the best laugh..it's really funny!!! lols..had lotsa fun on the train laughing lols...

met uncle dan to have him pass me the vodka and my shorts from my cousin...lols...thanks man...

sighs...

i don't know why..but then recently, like after that incident, she's stopped telling me things..like about her bf and stuff..usually she did..but when i saw her, she didn't tell me about it..like i asked her about how's things with her bf, she'll be like ohh, like that lor...replies are like that else it'll be aiya, about bf the same shit lor..like that la...cuz' usually she'll just start her nagging about it..like about what happened and stuff..hmm...we're like drifting apart...although it's only a few days...to me, it seems like years...

well, i'm really sorry if i've done anything which made you not telling me stuff...but think about it again the things i've done for you..not that i've done so much for you..but when you're in like deep shit, i'm always there to help you...i don't feel appreciated sometimes...sigh..well, not always you get it in your way...i don't get anything in return for helping you...i know you need help, i just helped you out within my means cuz' i don't want you to get hurt or exposed...plus i don't demand anything in return...sigh..perhaps i'm being overly sensitive that i'm thinking this way...but i'm like that towards my friends..cuz' you mean a lot to me that's why i'm behaving like that..else i'll not even care..haha...

but like i say, perhaps i'm being too sensitive over this..and perhaps i'm thinking too much...

well sleeping soon..else i won't be able to wake up on time hee..

sian....

2009-08-22T23:03:00.005+08:00

talking about today...let me start from the part when i first woke up...

woke up, luckily i set my alarm 15mins before my normal waking up time...took a wash, showered then did my makeup, hair and uniform...was still thinking, where is daddy? isn't he supposed to wake up by now...but no...then when i'm like almost done, i heard the door opened from the outside, so i supposed daddy must've went to drive at like 2am...omg...i didn't know..i thought he was still sleeping..

rushed through...i told him it was 515am reporting cuz' usually he'll be slow..so yeah, i was like already late...it was already 450am when i left house...he really sped all the way...except for the part where he was at the speed camera side...the one after exiting dairy farm...then when he was at toa payoh, suddenly the speed dropped to 80km/h...he maintained a 120km/h all along and then suddenly it dropped....i was thinking, daddy must be really tired...i felt really really bad that he has to work for the midnight just to be able to fetch me to work...=( but really appreciated the thought that he didn't mind despite being that tired...cuz' before that, when he was back, he was actually sleeping on the sofa...was actually supposed to be resting while waiting for me to be done but no, he fell asleep..guess he was that tired...he's a super daddy!!!

flight was really smoonth...with faridah and me at the back...was really SUPERB with the seniors at the back =D haha...this was team work man..finished and cleared everything before everything else lols...great man!! I LOVE IT!!! lols...then she told me she wanted to have a swab in flight as tomorrow i was supposed to do the later padang kl i think...the 1535 reporting...she didn't want 152/328 cuz' it was all morning flights for her...for my case i'm alright...of course an earlier flight would've benefited me cuz' i'm studying the next day..so ya lor..lols...swabbed!! meaning i'm more tired...

after flight, met DD..he was late as usual cuz of sean..not because he was late....waited there for solid 30mins...was hungry and tired la..practically cuz' i woke up earlier...then he came first cuz' he didn't want me to wait alone..went to get some stuff and yeah, sean joined us later...the planning was to have dinner buffet...but i really didn't know what happened that it was cancelled..so we went to sim lim to have lunch then to nua...looking for sean's screen protector...then headed to town...walked to town...i suddenly got so pissed when we were around the path that led to PS...i didn't know why...perhaps it was due to the hot weather, plus too much walking and the fact that i was freaking tired...i just walked my way through ignoring whether the both of them are at the back...while nearing taka, i suddenly just flared up and said to just go home while DD & sean can go "bio cai" (looking at pretty gals)..apparently, i was kinda pissed when DD just wanted to walk all the way to just "bio cai"..that's why ba i got so pissed...ended up everyone just went back...was back at his place rested...then sean asked to go to imm to look for his screen protector...i'm ok la..cuz' while on the bus, i slept la...was really tired lor...

suddenly, it was DD"s turn to get pissed...i started asking him questions what about what i had overheard when sean was talking about pearly blah blah...like going to JB with them or something...ok, perhaps i HAD hearing problems but i DID heard pearly's name...and it has something got to do with going somewhere...well, if you don't bother to tell, i'm fine...but the fact that you're going out with HER, i'm totally not into it man!!! if you really want, fine, you can go ahead while i just go out with my guy friends..be it alone or a group...since you want things to be that way then...and i'm really pissed on why he kept messaging those "GALS" argh!!!

perhaps, i shouldn't probe in too much about his cell, his messages, blah blah...else he might think that i'm checking on him or whatsoever...but please, who would be happy when seeing such stuff...and yet the gf doesn't even know about it cuz' the bf doesn't explain!! since he finds that there isn't a need to explain why or to tell her what he had sms his "gfs" then i think, the next time if a guy friend did sms me, i don't see a need why i should tell you...if you think this is reporting then fine, go ahead, stick to your ways...but for me, i just feel that to prevent any misunderstandings from happening it's better to let the other know...well, enough on saying that man!!! boy, how long can it just continue...

then, DD just somewhat showing his temper by slamming this and that...took a single, wore it and put his wallet and stuff like getting ready to go somewhere but not informing me or should i say updating me...simply treating me like transparent after i had asked about this "PEARLY" thing...who the fuck is she that when i mentioned her name you'll give me that face or just flare up...like wtf!!!! please, is she your gf or me?? seems like i have no position then...the moment i hear her name, i will be boiling automatically and i'm FUCKING DEAD SERIOUS ABOUT IT!!! i just can't stand her name...even if i were to meet her, and some form of introduction is made, i wouldn't care less about her...just a lame piece of shit!!! then sean arrived..he did tell me nicely...but after that, when he was on the way down, he fucking totally ignored me lor...i was like wth!!! reached imm, headed to daiso got sean's stuff and then walked around...there was this time when sean had to pass by giodarno and met his old colleagues, guess what?? DD was so fucking rude, walked away and just went to subway to order his food...without even asking us what are we having...i didn't even feel like eating subway!!! i just want something soupy for my dinner...and not that...no doubt it's healthy...sighs..well then after he ordered, he totally treated me like transparent as if i wasn't there...cuz' he took his meal and just find his seat ignoring my presence when it was so FUCKING OBVIOUS i was waiting for him...i got angry and pissed...sat down and threw my stuff and that was when he started asking why wasn't i eating...i just said, someone just treat me as though as i was transparent!!

was so fucking pissed...i just ignored whatever he was saying and just didn't feel like eating subway cuz' the smell of it really made me wanna puke...if you're reading this, i know you would've said: why didn't you tell me then...

i feel like replying to you straight!! why in the first place you didn't ask or suggest where to eat or whether we had anything in mind on where to eat...argh!! just walked away and went to look for the toilet!! then headed back to subway...after that he somewhat cooled down and started talking to me asking what i wanted to eat blah blah..i hecked!!! was so pissed lor..i didn't mind if i didn't had dinner...then they finished their meal...walked around...i went to giant and got my stuff for tomorrow's flight ma...yeah...everything was alright liao la...on the way back, sean sent us..went to DD's place again...to fix sean's screen for his new omnia pro...then he made my dinner for me which was the noodles we bought earlier...as in those maggie la..but dried de...after that he just gone quiet la..i don't know why la...suddenly like that...after that never talk till he send me back lor...argh!!!

and yeah, while i was blogging there was this loud thunder...am really shocked la..my heart was like...omg!!! it was as if my heart was pierced!! omg...and i'm totally shocked!!! well need to wake up at 445am...ciao everyone!!

*hopes tomorrow flight will be a great one!!

i really don't know..
don't know what happened today...
if you just want me to feel how it was like being ignored..
well, you've gotten it...
but i'm really sorry if i had just walked on and on...
i just didn't mean it...
you knew it...
i felt "pek chek"..
well, you did said you understood...
but hmm..apparently, it doesn't seem so..
perhaps, you're tired too...
till then...
but still i'm really pissed about this "PEARLY" thing...

sby activated

2009-08-20T22:53:00.003+08:00

was intending to party last night...and i confirmed with winnie liao...then guess what, my plan was screwed all thanks to derrick..he reported sick la..but in a way it's good cuz' i work and don't waste money on cab fare back home after club you see..been spending like shit la..but don't know what i'm spending on..expenses is like damn freaking high...sigh..nevermind lor...

till now i couldn't look for something similar to my levi's wallet...sighs...i think i shall consider..or perhaps i don't even need one...no doubt my wallet's like damn bulky but yeah man...hmm..i'll see la..i intend to get something like a pouch where i can store my cell, some cash, some cards yeah...miscelleaneous...lols...

back to what happened today..flight wasn't that bad..but then just felt that some people trying to act smart la...not letting the new crew learn...well, some people are just like that...not to mention names for god knows who will be reading and next day rumours will spread...well, that's TIGER AIRWAYS for you..hmm...intention was good but somehow i felt, it's doing everything!! lols..yeah, pleasant flight la...good sales too =D oure lucky la...cuz' during 152, pax were like swarming to us asking for this and that..which was good...haha...153, there's this petty pax..hate him to the core..till now i still remembers his face!! argh...it's like the cart was parked near row 3 as daph was attending to pax at row 1 so took some time ma..cuz' they wanted to get some DFS items...so yeah man..need to like wait ma..guess what?? he was like mumbling to himself saying this...

the cart is parked here for like almost 10mins, when will it pushed away?? this is so absurb...

i explained why cuz' daph's doing sales so we can't just push the cart away..it would be rude...and he's reply: ohh but it's here for like 10mins..way too long...

wth la..you think what?? argh!! nevermind...
*breathe in, breathe out*
after that the cart was finally pushed, he gave that kinda look like oohhh, finally and he was like giving this *zik zik* sound like as if he's pissed la..omg, if you're that rich, please for god's sake, go take some comercial airlines and PLEASE!! TAKE THE 1ST CLASS!!!! and you'll have nobody disturbing you....you can have like the whole cabin in peace...with no disturbance...sometimes, how i really wished somebody would make a movie out from budget airlines..like how pax behaves and how pax expects from us...like shit lor...and to show how the poor cabin crew are being bullied la...argh..toots one lor...should ask jack neo to film a movie like that ah...like that ah, pax will understand how the crew will feel lor...

come to think of it...if they don't, i feel like doing so la..but it's like discriminating la..haha...

yeah after flight, go eat with daph at mac..then head back home..talking about some stuff...and that *comBARKment* lols...daph la..making people laugh...saying that if the pax were to put the hand luggage horizontally, the luggage will turn vertically and BARK!! lols...funny la...really laugh like mad...apparently for your information, it's mocking at someone la...lols...we all know who lols..

back here and guess what?? my brother's the best!! i love him to bits!! i don't know which website he got the songs from but it's really POWER la!!! lols...the latest songs from the UK!! woots!! new songs for my touch =D good..

tanning tomorrow..hope the sun's good =D *prays

2009-08-19T19:24:00.003+08:00

overslept today la..wasted...argh...skipped school again...argh...must be the game that i downloaded yesterday lor...cuz' after downloading, i continued to play lols..it's was about 2am la..omg la...haha..then i think my alarm went off..still early...guess what, i didn't woke up on the other alarm clocks...boo!!!! nevermind...

and today, planned everything well to party...ended up can't go cuz' i was activated for 152/328..sob...nevermind since i'm working with daph...hope to see DD tomorrow then =D

a day just with him

2009-08-19T19:13:00.005+08:00

18th aug '09
it was a great day..hee..was out with him the whole day..from far east plaza to ion to wisma to taka to orchard central then to PS where we made our back from there...had dinner at xin wang =D lols...woots..i did up my hair and stuff..it was my first time being so pretty when we go out lols =X

bought for him 2 pairs of jeans from uniclo....hee..guess what happened there man..there were these 2 gays that were there and this guy who's wearing shades was the better looking one la...but then, still turn off la..when he talked about things...like saying how clothes were that cute omgf!! lols..but he was eyeing DD lols...guess he's that attractive la..haha..and hor, DD even dreamt of them wahhahaaha...

he ordered pork noodles in papaya soup and cherry float =D

curry chicken noodles and HK milk tea =D

what a day!!!

2009-08-17T00:59:00.003+08:00

damn!! it was a shitty day today!! with juniors again..not all..but that one particular junior!!! argh!! that flat face argh!!

first thing first!! woke up early..was tired but what to do..meeting amelia ah jie at 8am...woke up at like 615am as i'm afraid i'll take long to do up my hair...bathed and all and then to do makeup and my hair..while doing my hair i was like totally pissed cuz' it just couldn't stand!! argh!!! so nevermind, did it a few times...suddenly while doing it at the 4th time, i felt nauseous!! argh...i don't know why..then my stomach is acting up...it's damn pain i tell you!! it's like going through some ordeal!!! argh!! and i tell you, it's like killing me cuz' i knew it when this kinda shit happens, it's got to be my low blood!! argh...didn't know why it came back cuz i remembered that freaking doctor told me that the medication was good enough that i won't have head spins, blackouts or whatever related to low blood...but now it came back..i was on pills and NOW it came back!! i took all of the medication lor!! argh!! come to think of it, i think the doctor cheated!! perhaps he knew i was a cabin crew and he's like ya, trying to earn some money out from me...shit la...damn!!

then back to it..while tying up my hair, i was like panting, perspiring and just held my hair up for like awhile before going at it again...at times i just couldn't make it..so i just sat at the dining chair and drank water...it didn't really helped much...i remembered the sweets...so i was looking for it!! in the refrigerator!! lucky there were like 3 sticks...took one and chew...was better...but still no good...hecked and just quickly do up my hair and voila it's done..except that it was still messy but i couldn't be bothered cuz' i'm afraid if i start to do it again, it will be back again..so yeah, just stopped and moved to change and out i went..met up with ah jie...and she's even later than me la...omg..i'm really like late for that 5mins..cuz' i told her when that situation happened...but anyways, we were damn early..like 915am we've reached...still can have breakfast at BK...so yeah ate!! i was hungry and gastric acted up...best part was after eating i went to the loo...cleared everything lor...like omg!!! then i started to get hungry la...shits

briefing all that and yeah started to feel hungry...was lucky i'm well..so just prayed for the flight to be better...started with service and stuff...didn't realised that flat faced bitch (ok, i know i'm bad...but then to someone i hate, i'm so so so sorry, i'm just like that..too bad!!) was so defensive...and too sensitive liao lor!! damned!!! argh...i really didn't like to work with her la..cuz' i've never seen someone my junior who's like telling me to do things!! another shavira!!! argh!!! everything i talked about, she's so sensitive..i'm just like asking la!! will it DIE????

damn!!

told me off lotsa times...i know what i'm doing so don't tell me what to do...and guess what? that flat faced told me not to print sales summary?? like HELLO?? i know la, you think i first day use POS system ah?? and please lor, i work more efficiently than you do lor..i dislike pieces of paper around..so yeah, i do it all when landing into SIN can't ah...any problem with that...and please,do not fucking question a senior who's been working to closely a 3 years!! while you, not even a year!! argh!! and please, i know the standards of ah jie, so don't tell me whether i need to ask permission to close my cart or not?? i didn't said i wanted to close the carts but just stowing back the things back to my cart cuz' ah jie will do that..as my cart is as good as empty..duh?? who will want an empty cart to be out!! use cow sense also know la!! come on la!! damn!!! shit her!! hated it man!! telling me this and that...best part lor, didn't tell me anything, just keyed in whatever that's not keyed in...ended up we got shortage..to us la, we suspect that she actually keyed in the things that's not supposed to be keyed!! cuz' we couldn't have shortage one lor...go think la, collect money for ice, for hot water, how can shortage?? argh!!!

lotsa shit happened...she assume everything lor...then nevermind...cuz' pax lost cash on board..so i merely asked la like this

me: when you count money right, was s1 beside you?

flat faced: (exclaims) what do you mean? do you know that this question really is very sensitive to certain people anot? obviously when you're counting money there's two people la!!

me: i don't mean that way..just want to check whether she's with you that's all..not implying that you were the one counting it..

flat faced: but no lor, it's as if you meant something..and please, i helped you to count the cash..

me: (got SO pissed) i think it's ok, no point talking and ya, anyways, fyi, s2's the one counting money so don't touch the pouch ok?!?!?

i just said it so loudly lor..cuz' since she want to draw lines right, i draw also la..plus she like never top up lavatories all that la damn!! all i do lor..collection of trash also la..she want to draw lines then be it..i used that against her lor..

flat faced: ok lor, since you said so i think i shall not touch the money...

in my heart i was like wth la..if like that you want to draw so clearly when i'm only just being concerned whether when she's counting the cash, there's someone to witness her..cuz' i don't want her to be accused if the cash gets stolen or something..since she thinks that i said something that greatly offended her..then she shall bare whatever shortages there is la..damn!! and true enough there were shortages..by right, no shortage lor..i don't know how the damn hell did she keyed in more stuff to her cart when she has already told me that flight close, everything done..that was why i printed out the consolidated sales ma..but she said that wasn't the one..tell you what happened!!!

flat faced: (when ah jie wasn't around) next time when you do the consolidated sales, do not help the s3 to print...s3 can do it herself and by rights, s3 should do this and pass the paper to you and not s2 do it..so better to not touch it!!

me: (in my heart) knn, you're god damn lucky i'm in a good mood else you'll kena f up and down i tell you!!

when ah jie got back in, counted the cash, there's shortage!! argh!! which shouldn't be lor..i wanted to hint ah jie that the paper i printed was correct but i didn't know how to put it cuz' flat faced apparently said this..

obviously the receipt with the higher amount is the correct one la..that's why i told you, don't do things for s3 cuz' you wouldn't know if she has sold something from her cart or something...

kau!! i was like freaking pissed la...argh!! shoot me from the start!!

then while counting the cash, i suddenly remembered that when i thought there was shortage that time, she was busy keying in all the other items from my cart for god know what reason...but didn't tell me..i was busy counting the cash so i didn't bothered much cuz' i thought she was just tallying the stocks to the sales summary...but little did i expect that she actually keyed in the other items la..without me knowing..wth la...cuz before that when i asked her, she said it was done..with the closing of flight..that was why i printed the whole sheet...didn't expect there were changes and the best part, she didn't inform me...wth lor..she draw lines till like that..damn..ended up shortage!! should've asked her to pay la..argh!!

yeah after flight had dinner with jasmine then off to home..crap all the way la..lols..funny lor...haha...

alright, all of the whining, i shall go koon liao!! lols...tomorrow, a new day, new lecturer!! school ma!! lols..nights peeps =D

638..

2009-08-14T21:07:00.022+08:00

what a "great" flight yesterday!!! omg la..luckily marine put me s1 or not i can really die at the back la!! the new crew wasn't that bad after all except that i hate the way she looks at you, talk to you..one big attitude man!!! and that idiotic s2...f***ing lazy can!!! shit la...that flower!!! argh!!!

*ranting time!!! *

everytime i see her name, i sian half liao...just don't like working with her..she just takes her own sweet time, not arranging the bags and stuff...not really doing her duty as her role...during the 1st sector, i was all by myself lor...the other 2 in the cabin don't know do what...seatbelt sign on liao...s2 at the AFT really taking her bloodly sweet time la..please!! all these can do it after takeoff and you know, 638 lor..plus it was a damn full load!! argh!!! damn it!! don't know how to help with the baggage but stood behind the galley doing your chilling of beers and wines??? all these are minor la...argh!!! talking about it makes my blood boil...she's already a senior and yet, doing things like this...what an example to show to the junior man!!! bully junior she knows la...make full use of her lor...wth..i just hate it when it was during boarding..otherwise all's well...

the second sector, i couldn't take it!! made my blood boil even more...she's like just standing in the seats...not really so much of directing pax to their seats but then ya man, it's like ya she's in MISS TIGERAIRWAYS!!! argh!!! just stood there...where so many people don't know their seats...you can just show them what...to expedite...the bags and stuff..you can arrange since there's lotsa time...at least the junior's doing something unlike our dear s2!!! argh..there was a time where i couldn't take it...i had to walked all the way to row 24 and she's like just standing there to look..s3(junior) she did help la..but at that time she was busy with another pax's bag so i'm alright but that s2 argh!! stood there like a wood, waiting for me to walk all the way...imagine if CIC needs me?? i don't draw lines, so i help as much in the cabin as i could..be it bringing pax to their seats, how far the rows are...whether the baggages are neatly arranged..i did it..i don't draw lines...was too pissed that when i walked to row 24, she FINALLY stepped out to bring that pax to her seat...which i didn't bother but walked quickly to row26 and somewhat turned my back to s2 and ignored her...i kept stepping to the back and i think i accidentally stepped onto her shoes but i hecked!!! argh..was so pissed..and just walked all the way to the front...

tell me, how can you work with such people???

12th aug '09, wednesday
woke up and went to school..was slightly late (as usual) but not as late like at 10...was happy la..haha..that i attended school..like finally...the lecturer was really amusing!! i didn't understood what the hell he was teaching about..but then, i tried to analyse the topic by looking at the book and tried to understand...omg la..i was so amazed that i could even teach daph was has been attending school since day 1 whereas i only attended school like for the first day lols...the teacher had degrees from china...that explains why his teaching sucked a little..i kinda pity him...cuz' i supposed his english is really that bad..but how in the world could SHINES get people like that to teach...ended up lots of people came in and out of class listening to how he taught...guess what, he was terminated..just that day...i don't know whether i should call this a blessing or for the better...i feel bad..but then, it is true that we can't have a teacher like this...cuz' guess what, a student actually taught the teacher how omg la, can you believe it for god's sake??? then comes the best part!!

student: what does elasticity means?
teacher: oh it just means like that..the definition is like that..you can't change it..
student: but i don't know what it means, can you explain?
teacher: it's like that..i don't know how to explain..

omg la can you believe that this came from a teacher's mouth? that's what i felt as a teacher, you've failed..if you can't answer a student's query, there's no respect to you and we find that you're teaching nonsense...no doubt he's good, sending out emails to us regards to the mid term exam, there giving us ample notes, helping us all out..but then, i don't like this..cuz' this was more of spoon feeding...i dislike this kind of feeling...you learn nothing at the end of it..no doubt this is the last module but yeah man if things were so easy, there wouldn't be a need for school and there's no competition between schools and results..yeah, so next monday we'll have a new lecturer..hopefully it's better..and i MUST attend school!! jiayou mel!! i really don't know this is a blessing or what..lols...haha..

after school went back to change, grab my stuff, bathed and headed to DD's place...went to sleep..was a little cranky cuz' i didn't sleep well the night before..so ya..then went to sleep at his place...6plus left his place took the lrt to meet sandy at city hall to do my nails...met up and as usual she's late...went to have dinner cuz' we need to wait for the manicurists to be free...did our nails...we used the same colour and it's nice la!! lols...head to clarke quay mrt...then to the toilet to do our makeup and hair lols =D

did my hair...waited for shu hui at the toilet...the first attempt of the new clip was good...after that i had lotsa flyaways coming out from the sides, pissed la..lols...ruined my mood but i hecked...

1st attempt looked nice but lotsa flyaways

sis doing her hair lols

when shuhui came, i was still doing my hair...and was so freaking pissed!! argh...cursing and swearing like nobody's business...cuz' i was so pissed with my hair...lols...did it for awhile more and then i decided to give up..we headed to cheers, bought some drinks..actually i was the only one..then walked all the way to dblo...

once there, went to queue and when we're in, queued again for putting the bags...while waiting, we took some pictures...

once we deposited our bags, we headed to the drinks sections (ladies side) queued for our drinks!!! guess what, the place was swarmed with the WHITEs!!! not being racist here but yeah man..tell you guys what happened...it was HELL!!!

all of us thinks that the WHITES are really nice people, greeting you, being so sweet and stuff but tell you, it was shit that night!!! no doubt they queued..they squeeze their way through to get the drinks!!! argh!!! irritating can!!! using their elbows, their butts and stuff!!! argh!!! i got pissed...cuz the music really sucked!! (trance, not my kind of music..) and the crowd was a turn off!!! so after that i was like giving some sian face liao..so yeah man when the WHITES were like pushing their way, i did something real bad!!! there's this lady la, she's at the front(she beat us in the queue!!) she used her butt to push herself out..guess what i did?? i couldn't take it anymore so i punched her real hard on her butt!!! lols..fun sia..not once but a few times real hard..cuz' i was pissed, i needed to punch someone and just nice she was my punching bag..lols..great man!! so after that i pretended nothing has happened...guess what, they were all our age la...but freaking tall, freaking muscular!! omg!! how pro!! got our drinks, knew some girls, hit the dance floor..san was drinking and drinking...guess she was just too high la..and perhaps a little moody...hmm..yeah and after that hit the dance floor..the songs totally sucked but i didn't have a choice..

the planning was to go to dblo, drink lots, head to phuture and drank like hell...but ended up the plan got screwed...after dblo, some hiccups occurred, so we head to phuture...went in through zouk and used the back door (where smoking room was) to head up to phuture..we can't get in la..shits!! hated it!! then stayed at zouk..i was super sian lor..not into the songs la..all retro...sighs...was already SUPER SIAN liao..so i was telling myself to go home liao...but i was hungry..san wanted to go ph..i was thinking, i think of all the clubs, ph is the best la...with the music and crowd...sobs..but nevermind, i should go around so look around so that i know which are the best..=D went to supper at lau pau sat..had this bak chor mee...full man!! was really hungry la!! lols...then i took a cab and head home =D tired and shagged to the max la..i didnt' really enjoyed myself totally unlike the times at ph but it was fun la, squeezing and talking crap before..thanks shuhui and san =D

11th aug '09, tuesday

POS training that day..it was really nice of sean to send me there..but i overslept else i could've met DD in the car too...started at 9am and ended roughly around 11am..went to bugis to meet san..shits, and she was SUPER LATE LA!! was pissed liao lor...shopped la..i got my flats i wanted then my eyelashes and 2 shorts..haha...we went to bugis street, san decided to try on the wigs...see what happens lols...

her ah ma face lols..exposed...had lotsa fun la...lols...
when i wanted to go home, guess what, i lost my levis wallet..the one i always put my ezlink card, with our picture together, the budhha picture and the picture we took at wild wild wet...sighs...sobs man...all gone just an instant..it has lotsa sedimental value la..i remembered how this wallet came about...i'm so not used to it now...cuz' my wallet is so bulky..i doubt i'll ever find something similar again =(((

backtrack a little, monday there wasn't school cuz' the day before, it was national day!! forgotten what i did on mon..but i guess i was just slacking at DD's place...and yeah i remembered...we slept till very long lor..lols..when we woke up DD wanted to go eat liao..hungry...so called sean to send us somewhere to eat..lols..went to bukit timah for the chicken rice...the soup was good..the rest, i think normal la..i missed the chinatown one..after renovation gone liao..sobx =( then went back to fetch his dad to work...went back his home and fetched his mum and we headed to geylang to have soya bean curd and youtiao...as you know, with his mum, we can't stay there till late, else i was thinking of having herbal soup =(( but nevermind...DD has work the next day...headed back to his place, dropped his mum, and we 3 all went to gombak to look at the place where they need to return the car...it was near my old house la!! omg!! and i missed the days where daddy usually drives in...lols..then went back lor...

9th aug '09, sunday
it was national day!! SINGAPORE'S 44TH BIRTHDAY!! haha..was doing flight with my batch mate heyzel =D yay!! and shaan..all the seniors man!!! lols...haha...good flight to celebrate national day onboard too...lols...look at the pictures man!! lols..

SUPER LOVE THIS PIC =D

after flight, met DD and weiwen...we went to marina square to catch..

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra

it's so much better la..compared to transformers!! all the way action packed man!! woots!! lols.. 5 stars for this man!!!

alright, time to sleep..sighs...if only DD had called earlier..else i would be in JB with them to eat argh!!! i want to have a good massage!!!

wow what a day!!

2009-08-08T22:17:00.015+08:00

6th aug '09

it was captain daniel walker's birthday!! weeeeee...haha...we bought him a cake and celebrated his birthday on board...just a small gesture...with zann, siti suriani and cic maria =DD superb crew!! hee...making this a memorable day to remember =D

8th aug '09

a great flight again with seniors!!! weeeeee...haha..and it's been a very long time since i last flew with Fitriah man..and PJ lols..it was fun!! haha..with the bees around!! it was TR454/104..on our way back into SIN TR455 there bees all over our aircraft la!! omg!! show you the pictures and you know what i mean =DD a rare sight!! haha...never ever seen this before!!!

after i got back..just wanted to camwhore la...hee...nice shades right..my ray bans!!! i wanna get another one!!!

this picture is just for you..
i wanna smile just like this =D
hee...
thanks for today =D

sigh..

2009-08-07T21:32:00.006+08:00

bored bored..

slept kinda late last night...i knew i wouldn't be called up today as i'm like doing 454/104 tomorrow...reporting's like at 620am..so yeah man...woke up and found my brother home..thought he hadn't bought lunch..i've forgotten it's half day school for today..as tomorrow would be national day...how i wished i could too..=(( which is so impossible..well, since i couldn't get him to get lunch for me and i'm really lazy...i decided to order kfc la...lols...my first time having home delivery..brother said that mac's faster...lols...nevermind...it's cheaper anyways...hee...spent like $17 bucks on lunch...cum breakfast lols...great eh...woots!!!

hmm...not updating for the few days man...i've been missing my clubbing days...sigh...having so muchfun dancing with sandy...lols..i still remember the days we used to spent at ph..lols...and yes, thanks sis for being able to be there to club when i need you..really thanks =D

like wow..it's like 4 weeks since i last clubbed..the last time was with sandy!! i miss her liao la...sobx...

i've been lazy la..for the past few days..i just want to nua...right now, shits, things are already piling up on the floor already...sigh...wanted to pack my stuff but then, sigh, everytime i wanted to do it, i will just tell myself, there will be another day la..sobs...that's why room's not packed!! and i so wanna get a sofa bed..it's really comfy...sighs..but then...how man...my brother doesn't want my bed...sobs...nevermind..i'll wait..till the day i have my own sofa bed...after this module ends, i'll start taking driving..then after that, pack my room, REVAMP it...and yeah make more space!!

note to self:

melissa, you can do it!! just throw everything you don't need and not keep it!! it's all trash so yeah, just throw!!! and your room will be neat and clean!!

things to get

-a new desktop (cuz' i'm using my laptop which is like shit)

-canon dslr camera (see how la..cuz' my digital one really sucks now...)

-to pamper myself with a branded bag (gonna get this LV bag lols..)

-my car license

-after my TP get a car!! yay!! and DD's sharing it with me!! muackz!! and i'm getting honda fit!!

-sofa bed

-dresses

-new clothes

-new table

-better sound system (so that i can turn my room to a club lols..)

i think that's about it!! woots!! it seemed little but i've got like lotsa to get la..omg!!

and shits..i've yet to paint my nails man...argh!!! need to paint and get it done and sleep!! argh..nights people!!!

school's started!!

2009-08-03T22:05:00.004+08:00

school's started today but yeah, i didn't feel like going la...sian..sigh...not so much of staying too late for the night but then ya...just don't feel like going lor..

mindy smsed me saying that i got a credit for my previous module law..hmm..not bad but then i'm kinda disappointed cuz' i could've gotten better results...i was expecting like a distinction la...but then sighs...you know, i hadn't been attending school and had little understanding about those terms and stuff...so i was thinking, all i could was to blame myself la and not anyone else la...

at least i do admit it was my mistake for not studying harder la...

sighs..and for this module, it's the last lap man my dear melissa!!! please wake up la...argh!!! stop dreaming man...argh!! sigh..sometimes i do hate myself la...i'm experiencing this shit..

problems are arising at this point of time...why??? why does it arising only NOW??? so many ups and downs...i need him by my side to listen, to console, to dote, to be the nicest person on earth that anyone could ever be....i know by saying such stuff, i'm being damn selfish...he's also going through what i'm going through back then when i started flying...like what daph told me about being overly friendly and about being too nice to people as people just want to take advantage of how good i was blah blah...they are not sincere in being friends or should i'd rather say just want to you know dig out some information i know and just being nice to me...that's what he's experiencing now...i know i'm really bad...like not being there for him and expects him to be there for me doing all those stuff...sighs...is it like so selfish of me??

hmm...thinking about so many things last night..thinking about what he had said...all those...even it means to hurt it deep in my heart but then yeah, it's like self-enlightenment la...sighs...how how how????

am i really strong as i seemed so??
or i'm just a weakling?
i'm not myself i know,
just be patient with me..
but i think you can't..
your patience is running out soon..
you said i crawled up to your head and took advantage..
but no, it wasn't like that...
sighs...
who understands me??
what i want??
i just need THAT!!!
sigh...

head is very bad nowadays...my giddy spells are back..it all links to fatigue i guess...thank god i didn't went to school today too...at least i've got plenty of rest...but then again, i can't seem to get enough rest...the day just past so fast man...sighs...i just wished time could stop and i can just rest till i had enough and then tada!! when i'm done, i'll just like you know go to work...wouldn't it be great!!

this really got me reminded of this movie, i've forgotten the title...it started with this guy finding a remote control which could fast forward his life if he finds it irritating or whatsoever...i've forgotten the title..although he did regret...but then for me, all i want to is just to press PAUSE when i need to rest, to have fun and spend time with my friends and family and that special someone...that's what i wanted...after that when i had enough, i'll just like press PLAY to let my life run again..like going to work and stuff...sigh..i won't FAST FORWARD it thought...it's not a good thing to do...sigh...

i know i'm thinking too much...there's just too much on my mind...i don't know and i wished i'd know...arghhhh...

guess what, i've been smelling this scent which was like my grandfather's perfume...he's already gone but somehow, i can sense that he's here in our house...i don't know...but then ya, i can smell it...just as soon as i got into my room...hmm....weird...or perhaps i'm just thinking too much...argh!!!!

feeling better

2009-08-02T23:05:00.003+08:00

i'm feeling better..i guess that i'm just too stubborn...perhaps i just need to do something i longed for...just "SOMETHING" which i don't know what...sigh...

had a talk with him not on the phone but through msn...lucky man...but i guess he understood me too well..

he said he did it on purpose knowing what was my plan today...well, if he really did it on purpose then fine!!! i just want us to spend time together..since he said that, then fine!! it did hurt me pricked my heart too much...but on the other hand i was thinking...i didn't lose out...it was him...cuz' ultimately we didn't meet...and when we didn't meet, he blamed me...like saying...see, if you went to gym with me, you could've met me and we could've spent time with each other....

so now, i see, i get the whole picture...i didn't know that he wanted me to have a taste of my own medicine....i didn't know that relationships are like that...i thought it was supposed to be give and take?? at first he said he wanted me to experience what is it like to have missed out on a lot if i slept late..(but duh!! i didn't sleep late on purpose..it was cuz' i was stuck outside!!!) then he continued saying he wanted me to feel how it was to be rejected ( like that time when i went to club on his off day) then after that i said something, he said he wanted me to feel what it is like when everytime he wants to meet me and i don't feel like it..something like that...sigh..and after that he said, no he just purely wants me to be happy and he's saying nonsense cuz' he's feeling too stressed...

well, now i can return you or should i say pour the words back to you...YOU DESERVE IT!! cuz' had you went according to my plan, you wouldn't have felt so stressed and we could've just had fun together...going for the massage and catching a movie after that...enjoying each other's company...

whether you read this or not, i don't care..sigh..i've already apologise what do you want me to do...=((((((

well, but ultimately, you got your point over me and i got mine over to you...sometimes it's not because i'm selfish but you too plays a part...and i'm not as what you think i am..perhaps you really need someone right now to listen and talk to you but then, i need to tell you, it's not me that just chose to kept quiet but then sometimes when i gave my opinions, you'll start to feel like...you know...then after that, instead of getting things right, everything will be ruined..we'll be like quarrelling...do you like it?? everyone will get frustrated and stuff...that's where things will be like ya..getting worse...argh!!!

sigh..i really want to know what you're thinking..it's always you knowing and understanding me but not the other way round...how unfair..you know what i wanted but not me...argh!!! sigh..perhaps you chose to notice all these little little things while i don't or should i say i don't bother...sigh...what has happened..argh!!!

problem for the toolbar solved!!

2009-08-02T22:30:00.003+08:00

finally this is solved!! now i can blog and upload pictures...but not now..lols...

try this people!! it works for IE and other explorers..tried, proven and tested =D

if you're using FF still use the same settings from below and then hold onto ctrl and press f5..see if it works =D

For those who need help try the steps below:

Tools -> Internet Options
Click on "Connections" page tab
Click on "LAN Settings" button (if you are using Broadband)
Check "Use a proxy server for your LAN ..." checkbox
Click on "Advanced" button
Under HTTP type, input "proxy.singnet.com.sg" for proxy address and "8080" for port

hee hee...i got this from the blogger forum..if you people do read my blog..please try..hope it helps =D

finally!!

2009-08-02T21:27:00.003+08:00

he finally flared up!!! sigh...i knew it, it's been within his limits already...but then alright, i shall stop talking about it...it's all my fault!! all my freaking fault!!! sigh...

i don't know what now!! i really don't fuck la!!! fuck everything!! i just want to be alone!!! i so want to be!!!!! argh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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i'm just so pissed off with myself!!! nothing's going right...argh!!!!!!!!

I SERIOUSLY HATE MYSELF NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*BANG HEAD ON THE WALL!!!!!!! *

tired tired tired!!

2009-08-02T20:24:00.003+08:00

came back from 716 this morning..sigh..really shagged to the max man!!! and blogger is still not back to how it's SUPPOSED to be..the uploading of pictures part is still missing..i feel like transferring over to livejournal man!!! argh!!!

it was a so-not-right day for me yesterday...waking up and everything was alright...woke up at the correct time and stuff..went to have lunch...when it was time, i went to have my bath and then i was thinking of doing my hair up first as usually it takes up most of my time doing it and it will always lead to lateness!!! so ya, tried and it was alright...

then to do my makeup!! it was so freaking irritating!!! the stupid fake eyelashes were like poking at the ends of my eyes...it's so painful...the other batches of eyelashes from faceshop were alright..but then for this one, it's a NO NO!! sigh..it was the best la initially but now, i guess it's not so good lor...hmm..nevermind i think i'll try the bugis one the next time i finish using those up...and the best part, the glue that i was using was already like out of stocks from sasa a long time ago..it's really good but ya, i need to wait..it's been months now man...alright back to it, my makeup was well on already just that i need to put the eyelashes and i can go out le..but then i don't know why..something wrong somewhere...i supposed it's due to lack of sleep that make my eyes puffy but it can't be seen la just that it makes it puffy and the eyelashes doesn't go on well...so ya, my right eye was crap...with the eyelash almost dropping( cuz' i intend to take a cab there as i'll be late if were to take the train) so i was thinking to do it when i've reached...like remove the eye makeup on my right eye..it's my first bad day i've ever encountered in my almost 3years in TIGEr!!! argh!! shits man!! it was 115pm when i went out...i was almost bursting out to tears when i was walking towards the lift..i saw him waiting for me patiently there..because when i woke up i just don't feel right...i felt shagged, don't feel like working and damn tired!! it's just so not right to go to work!!! argh!!! and with my makeup, the time....argh!!

waited for the cab, it took so long...ended up he was saying to call a cab..i was telling him no point de...confirm can get de...cuz' it was only 130pm..reporting is at 250pm..it's still long..unless i couldn't get a cab at 2pm then ya, i'll call..so after that he called someone...i thought it was the cab at first but then he told me it was sean..telling him to meet later...but then the conversation was just too long to just say that...there was this stupid uncle all the way at the front fighting for a cab too..i was so MADDDD i tell you..but then, due to my luggage that was popping out, the uncle chose to pick me up..and i was like YAY!!! cooled down liao..but then the uncle went the wrong way...should exit through dairy farm but he exited through bukit panjang that way...then he called sean..i asked him why..he said actually just now he called sean was to ask him to pick me up to work then he paid for the petrol so that i don't need to rush and also i can save up on cab...

*he's so sweet right?? but i was like argh!! a pain in the ass la*

so ya i got the cab liao needless for all those and he called sean to tell him sorry...then the stupid uncle don't know how to ask whether to go from dairy farm or bbp that highway...shit la..i was saying out loudly in the cab..saying that if you want to earn cash it's not like that what..it's called cheating!!! should've asked the passenger which direction to go ma...usually when i'm almost late right and i take the cab, the uncles will ask me which way i'd preferred unlike this one..(like i said it's not my DAY!! DAMN!!) was getting cranky again..whining and i just started crying in the cab la..just don't feel like going to work...he was telling me to relax...not to cry and stuff..but i was like pissed with myself..i don't know why i got so fiery for the past few days...is it because of fatigue?? but no what...sigh..it's only this week that i'm working like mad..other than that last week wasn't like that lei...sigh..i don't know la...argh!!! it's just not my day!!

reached BT went to toilet, bid him goodbye...he was really being nice and all la..i am really bad!!! fuck!! argh!! then to remove the eye makeup on my right eye la..it went on well...and i was glad...went to briefing room and smsed him apologising to him that my mood was like that..he said nevermind..i was like...he's really patient lor...if it was other guys i supposed they would have ignored me...i was so early la...that even CIC wasn't there...perth was smooth...unlike last sat's flight with kaili...with that CIC...it wasn't as busy like last week's...but alright though, still as busy...at least i get to eat in the first sector...when we arrived, i saw shane again!!! lols..i told him i missed him so much that i flew to perth again!! lols..but then ya, this month's roster that's my only perth!! so i might've to wait for next month's or if someone's willing to change my flight...then after that it was the pax...argh!! there was this couple who's not really that old but maybe in their 60s who were seated at the overwing...row 1 was empty ma...so we need to at least shift them there cuz' they don't understand english...due to safety reasons...cuz' capt's announcement will be made in ENG too what...this stupid idiot seated at row1F was like saying it was so unfair for them to be shifted there and that she has paid for the 2 seats at the front...i was like erm...i beg your pardon...when she asked where they were seated i said 13..so she was like oh oh, then it's alright...wth la...saying that she paid for the whole row, i doubt it man!! you think it was my first day working here ah?? plus i can ask you to show me your itinerary if you want to make this big fuss...instead i said sarcastically or mdm, do you want to be shifted to row 13 instead?? winnie was telling me in chinese, i qian bian (meaning i was asking the obvious) cuz' she would want to sit there and get off first ma...i was telling her, i did that on purpose what...lols...settled with that but then there's this row 4 pax who were being rowdy la...argh!! DRUNK!! aussies you know...row 4E and 4F the guys that were seated...stupid man!! so noisy la..

it was a smooth flight other than those two matters la..other than that, everything was fine..still can rest my tired feet man..

well, after flight all of us took derrick..i told him my bad day..and how my arms were aching and feeling like as if i have carried weights and finished working out at a gym..he was saying that it was all due to fatigue!! unlike what HE said that i had too much sleep..see, i knew it!! just too tired..but HE insisted it was too much sleep..although i know that too much sleep will cause that but it doesn't happen to me...i sleep a lot and woke up having a heavy head that's all..sigh...what's going on?? what's happening to me????

i just feel bad these days la..especially towards him!!

*if you're reading this, just bare with me or rather if you can, just ignore this temper of mine!!*

it's been shit these few weeks..i don't know why..you've been there for me being patient and stuff..hearing what i have to say, there to dote on me and cared so much for me...but me?? what did i do?? all i did was to yell at you, flared up for no fucking reason and just ignore you...you do have your days of that but you still are so patient with me...cheering me up, telling me to cool off and stuff...but me?? all i did was to yell and just being sarcastic at times and being damn unreasonable when you're being nice...

was talking to sandy on msn..telling her what happend these few days..she totally FEEL me man..she said she was like this when she fly after she quitted she's become an angel...before that she was like a tigeress like what i am now..so fiery!! i do envy her la for her relaxing life now..but then i do love flying but not in terms of being a cabin crew...as in travelling...not that i hate my work but the irregular times,,,argh!! sandy was telling me to relax...i was in tears when i was telling her how bad i was to him...sigh...i don't know how long more am i going to be like that...being pissed and getting so agitated at the slightest things...

i used to club almost every week the past months...i was thinking now, back then why did i have to club so much?? now i realised that it can really lighten my burden...cuz' my clubbing days were wonderful...full of shit with sandy, dancing like maddd!!! and drinking...it was letting out all of the steam i had...cuz' after that, no matter how tired i was i felt that, that heavy baggage is gone just like that...just in an instant lor...sigh..

i remember we used to quarrel over clubbing but i'm so sorry la...really...=((((

hmm...if you really are reading this, i really thank you for all that you've done unlike me...i've never been doing anything for you...i can never cheer you up...i don't know why...sigh...all i feel now is to just give you a big hug la..i really want to see you...i really want to cry out loud la...been crying over the slightest things these few days..

my fiery temper, my fucking attitude, my mood swings...aiya EVERYTHING LA!!!

2009-07-31T22:27:00.003+08:00

i am really tired la!! damn roster!! i really don't know how they plan it man!! argh!!! it's really tiring especially for me who's like staying so freaking far!!!

i'm going to whine again!!

i just want to!!! need to vent it all out!!!

argh!!!

did 326/454..good flight with super good crew (ALL SENIORS!!) superb!! samuel was on board with his friends on 454 to have his lan gaming competition...jiayou jiayou!! if he wins, it's like a few thousand bucks...what a great way to earn hard core cash!! just by playing some games and you can earn it so easily...sighs...unlike my scope of job...plus for him, it's something that he LOVES to do man!! argh!!! well, he gets to travel too...sigh...why am i not so talented in games!! else i can succeed wahahaha...i should've taken a DIPLOMA in gaming blah blah blah...it'll help totally man!!

well back to the story..

after flight, went for this foot bath...it was worth like $5 bucks!! can you believe it?? it was so relaxing..i almost doze off the chair!! i think i'll go for a foot massage sometime soon...there's this gooey thing that will be formed when your feet are moved in that foot tub...then it will be formed like a mould and somewhat hug onto both your feet...it's great man i tell you...when the second step for the foot bath came, the lady just added another sachet of powder...the mould was then turned into liquid...just like magic!! lols...after that i thought i can just go find DD la...it's relaxing..i got a drink to just accompany the rest there but then we ended up talking shit la...i was wasting time la...cuz' it was kinda early ma..DD will be like going out about 6pm..so i was thinking, at that time it was 3pm...shouldn't be a problem to stay for awhile..then it dragged...argh!! i waited for my other senior who stayed near me la...cuz' she wanted me to accompany her back home too since we're staying kinda near...didn't expect it to be late!! very late!! like at 515pm then THEY all decided to leave!!! argh...ended up i can't meet DD

=(((( saddddddddd!!!!!!!!

sigh...HERE COME THE BEST PART, while at yishun, my brother smsed me to say that dinner wasn't bought for me..i was like...wth...if i knew, i'd have dinner with my colleagues man!! shits!! wasted man...what to do...went back, bathe, changed and went down to get chicken rice and roti prata!!! just so FREAKING hungry man!!i hecked la..eat lor...hungry ma..

now here i am whining and blogging...argh!!!

my feet aches...and plus somewhere near my calf and shin area, the leg just seem to not function well la...i don't know!! it can just suddenly be pain...and it's those kinda piercing pain..i don't know what's wrong with me..plus my back, it's killing me nowadays!! i don't know is it due to my backbone problem again since my last checkup in secondary school..sigh...what has totally happened to me?? i'm on the verge of breaking down...as in my body...PHYSICALLY!!! how how how!! help mmeeeeee....

tomorrow it's a 716..stupid flight man..although i love perth flights but then, another perth!! plus it's like straight after 2 morning flights!! how tiring man!! argh!!! nevermind...whine and whine, that's what i can do..argh!! shits!!

after that i'm off!! i think i shall go to jurong point on sun..to really do a foot massage and back massage..else my body's telling me to stop...it's failing me now and then..i don't know why...at this age??? it's terrible...not as if i'm like 40..i'm only 21...how can i??? sigh..sigh sigh....

28th july '09
felt bad..it was suppose to be our day out together...DD came back from his second night shift...i was waiting at home since 10am...cuz' i'm really afraid that i'll fall asleep...i didn't want to meet him straight cuz' i know he's tired especially after night shift...he's always tired...i can understand that..cuz' after my night flights, i'm really exhausted..so ya, i know...

i didn't know that my temper was really really bad!!! perhaps it was due to lack of sleep the night before...cuz' i was having the usual insomnia...just that few days...sigh...so i got really cranky and fucked DD upside down lor..i gave him a lashing la!! i'm like crazy!!! argh!!! scolded him and got angry and agitated for no freaking reason...i was so so unreasonable man!! i didn't know why...temper just shot up to the max....i said some nasty things to him...

the previous times when i wasn't there to accompany him, he forgave me...and i was like literally PS-ing him all by himself...like fuck la!! i was so bad i know...and the best part was i didn't bother...just want to have fun!! it's been umpteen times la..but he's still patient and let me go by my way...just want me to be happy and enjoy the time i had...even though he's sad and lonely...but me???? a bitch!!! just only that day...that one freaking day and i'm mad at him like as if he did something wrong like that...sigh..i really don't know what's wrong with me these days la!! argh!!!

*I'M SO SORRY DD SO SO SORRY!!!*

recently, i don't think i'm myself boy!!! i don't know what the hell is wrong with me...sigh...tired, short tempered, gets frustrated easily and my back and feet is giving me problems..what happened melissa??

next week school's starting..i don't know to rejoice or to moan again...although it's the last module, i promised myself to attend every single lesson and pay full attention!!! but sometimes, i just don't feel like going to school, thinking of how long the journey is to and fro and i can spend the whole OFF day staying at home to rest...sigh..it makes me just don't feel like crawling to school...i shall preserve and try!! i can do it!! last module!! do it well!! alright..i think i'll go play some mini games on my ds and let off some steam!! then i'll sleep!!

ciao everyone!! i'm sorry for the crude language used..just too tired and can't be bothered!! =((((((((

ps: i don't know what's wrong with blogger!! the template with the colours and uploading of pictures are gone!! i can't seem to upload pictures!! damn!!!

bye bye July, welcome August!!

using my brother's com to upload my post...

rain rain

2009-07-27T21:30:00.007+08:00

it's a great day to sleep today...the whole day lor...the best part, i wasn't aware that DD was doing another night shift man!!! argh...

i am so so forgetful can!!!!

sigh...nevermind...

no wonder, i was wondering why he didn't want to go out...this was the cause...he didn't even mention anything about it too...*sad*

well...slept throughout the whole day la basically...cuz' the night before, i just couldn't sleep...i don't know why...shits!!! having insomnia lately man!!! sigh...it's bad...cuz' i'm like 21 and i'm having insomnia???? i'm not under any stress nor anything...but then, ya why??? i need to get my sleep man!!! SERIOUSLY!!! woke up to play the ranch rush...was a great game...about farming...something similar to sims..wanted to upload the pictures of it but i can't seem to...i guess blogger is a problem la..argh!!! will do it some other times when this problem is solved then =D it's a fun game la..having lotsa trophies now lols...

i guess i can sleep well later...cuz' of the weather man!!
haha...it's good...and i'm getting hungry now...i think i shall stop having maggie liao..been having that for like the past few days...cuz i was having this craving for maggie...went to buy this brand cu qian yi ding...it's a damn good brand for maggie la...the noodles are damn Q!!! lols...i bought the spicy sesame oil de...when it's cooked, the aroma of the sesame oil fills the room and you really get hungry that easily la...omg...thinking of it, i'm really getting hungry man!!! lols...sigh...but

then i don't know what to eat la...sian...lazy to go down and buy food also...later my parents sure nag...argh!!! how how...and i'm yawning every now and then why??? lols..hmm...i think i'll just make soup for myself la...

been wanting to tan la...but then the sun's not out la...

ahhhhh just went to make instant soup...nice...but i'm still hungry...i think i'll still be hungry la...i'll just have my cadbury oat chocolate cookie...yummy!! lols...that is i'm hungry after the soup lols...alright, i'll be playing the game again =D

ciao!!!

this is meaningful!! i wanna share!!!

2009-07-26T22:19:00.004+08:00

This is very very true! a husband is not there juz to make money, a wife is not there juz to share your bed and make breakfast for you.. Love did not happen between you to just share a timetable, but daily routines could break a marriage..LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST WITH YOUR SPOUSE, IT WILL MAKE A DIFFERENCE.

To those who are married, .. Not married .. and soon to be married

MARRIAGE

When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.

She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked mesoftly, why?
I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Dew. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement whichstated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of mycompany.

She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Dew so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writingsomething at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleepand fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Dew.

When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce.
She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible.. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in amonth's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.

She requested that everyday for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Dew about my wife's divorce conditions .. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms .. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce .. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily .. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time .. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hairwas graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.

On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Dew about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite afew dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown sothin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mum out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become anessential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.

I drove to office .. jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind .. I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, Isaid, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because sheand I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't loveeach other any more. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.

Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and thenslammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and droveaway.

At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead. I know how her heart could not bear to hear my last words now. I still carried her, my last one...this time with my wreatched heart.

The small details of your lives are what really matter in arelationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank, blah..blah..blah.

These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

If you don't share this, nothing will happen to you..

If you do, you just might save a marriage.

tired

2009-07-26T20:40:00.006+08:00

it's really a hectic flight from yesterday man...i'm so loving my flight yesterday and not liking it as much..lols...well i need to be more specific lols...

it was with kaili...it's really good la to have us both at the back...the system was cocked up la...stupid la...but smart kaili!!! she suggested to press the reset button =D i did suggested something to our CIC but then, it was useless la..ended up i got told off but in a much nicer way...=.="

well, flight was bad and busy...we were really busy like hell man!! going up and down just doing service..shits la...argh!!! tired man...my feet!!! really lor...after that we felt bad to make use of our junior...but then, it's part of her job also what...then what, we busy like hell at the back she doing nothing ah???? my stupid system was perfectly fine but just that we took the orders down..and i was stupid enough to just wrote all the orders down...by right the orders that i've keyed in were just foreign and credit card transactions and the rest i will just need to write down so that i can do it at the back which is so much faster..but stupid me man!!! shits!!! i went to take down every single order la how stupid la!!! argh!!! like blurred la!!! i've not been doing perth la since the new POS system starts..and mind you!! how frustrating it can be when things in my cart finishes!!! cuz' 1 POS per cart..stupid right...slowed down the service la plus kaili has to remember what i've taken from her cart and it's making us all confusing lor!! shits!!! argh!!! but then nevermind la...it's all cocked up la i tell you...cuz when i was at the back figuring out what did i keyed in...then i realised, lucky CIC told me to print sales summary so that i know what's already in (meaning the foreign and CC) whew...it took me awhile to get enlightened lols...cuz kaili was nice enough to help me with the counting of stocks and everything...i was afraid i'll double key in the other orders ma..that's why we counted the physical stocks too...

but i tell you it was really SHITS man!!! it took so long...argh...till kaili has to set her cart up and do the other round of service...argh!! and best part the meals were all mixed...cuz' some were keyed in my POS..aiyoyo..this CIC making things difficult la...with the floats and stuff...argh...with this new system how can man..slow things down a lot la!! argh!!! toots!!!

but afterall was ok la...lucky man..we didn't have shortages man..or not sure die la!! argh...new crew was not bad la...she's just too panicky...like worried about things not done here and there for no good reason..you know, the situation was already like shit and here she is not helping at all nevermind but then making me more frustrated and panicky too...shits la!! lucky she's not at the back with me...do you know both of us didn't have the time to eat EVEN lor...5hours flight...imagine that!!! plus kaili is sick lor..i feel so bad la...no time to eat nevermind, don't know what that new crew doing also..shits one..ask me about hot meals order as if i'm the one doing it like that...not me taking the orders what...and i'm like freaking going to break down liao when things got screwed up in my cart and she's asking me about stuff here and there...wth la!! whew...but after all not so bad la...no shortages..i thought i have lor..scare me la!!!

the best part was the last part LOLS...couldn't help but laugh my heads out man!!! although i'm freaking tired la!! machiam tour around BT..cuz i thought the exit from the back will lead to the other side (only kaili knows what i'm talking about =D ) ended up we walked a freaking big round la!! lols...then on the way back, i just slammed kaili with the coins omg that was OUCH!! lols funny la..we were laughing even though she feels the pain..super hyped after flight man!! lols..then after that don't know what happened, she walked and she almost sprained her ankle la...but that position was freaking funny that i LOLed so loudly la...hahahahaha...i still can remember that stupid pose!!! lols..funny la...and finally after flight!! lols...

shit la and the best part, i did my hair so nicely and for the first ever time the hair stood with the help of my gel...it was really good la..but then we were too freaking busy that we didn't have time to take pictures shits man...if not can show you guys my great new uniform!!! lols...but nevermind la...i'm looking forward to do it better the next flight =D haha...shits man i'm still having perth on 1st aug...sigh...hopes it's going well!!!

just now,
didn't do anything la..woken up by DD's call...cuz' i told him to call me de ma..then after that he was buying lunch...ask him buy for me too lor...lols..then after i woken up, bathed and everything, went over to look for him...accompanied him la...it was just too short la but i'm glad that i did cuz' if not he's really bored la...for me i can just sleep the damn day but for him it'll really be BORED!! plus today's sun was superb la!!! shits!!! can't tan today..damn!!! i just hope on tues i can do it man!!! i want to just be like roasted red!!! lols BURNT totally lols...cuz the colour i am in now it totally shits lols...hmm..waiting lor...

well, looking around to do stuff la...and guess what, mummy didn't nag at me today man!! omg..it's like i can't believe it la lols...and and..i'm freaking pissed with my freaking roster...cuz' i emailed the person who's doing the roster saying that it's gonna be tiring and stuff blah blah...you can see in the previous post what i wrote..but fark!!! guess what happened to my whole freaking roster..all the flights are changed to you know what??? everybody dreads having!!! SBY!!! fark!!! i hated it la..i know she's getting this back at me lor...wth la i'm being nice to tell her my difficulties now like that what is this man!!! shits!!! go be a cabin crew la then you know what it feels if you get tired like that...shit right!!! argh!!! how mad i can be lor...damned!!! nevermind, breathe in, breathe out!!! phew!!!!

i really can't wait for 25th...
it's going to be like 4years!!
omg la...
never ever been so long in a relationship before..
well, time flies too...
suffered,
heartbrokened,
depressed,
fights...
all these ups and downs,
we've been through..
through thick and thin!!
it's amazing...
cuz' we almost thought we lost it all....
right??? it was really close!!!
am just so excited and looking forward to 25th next month!!!
hee =D
*loves!!

what a day

2009-07-24T00:43:00.006+08:00

23rd July'09
i was reporting for my actual flight TR152/328 de la...then while on my way there, i was called up to do another flight...it's the same other 4 sectors meaning i'm still getting paid the same lols but then coming back earlier la...my reporting was 715am..i told dad to reach there at 7am so it's like safe for me..i remembered once when i told him the exact time i need to reach, he was like late la...then like nothing happened like that..but i don't blame him la..cuz' it was my fault too ma....

yeah man, then i was asked to report for TR452/104...not bad la..short and sweet flight...lucky flight wasn't delayed...it was a 3man operations...shit la..and thank god i was FA2 if not shits man!!! was rushing like mad to gate 7...boarding was commencing liao..pax were all looking at me as if i was late for the flight lor...please la, want to blame, blame the one that couldn't make it in time...not me..i was early, in fact 15mins early for my flight lor...i mean my actual one...duh!! not late la...so don't those pax dare blame me man!! shits...it was Suriani Jemain on my flight...with haslina..ok la..all seniors..not juniors and i was like telling myself i better not be FA3 again on a319 la...always kena FA3 one lor..cuz usually junior will tell CIC i always do FA3 wth la...then i as a senior?? =.=" shit la...then nevermind lor...boarding liao...and i was panting like mad...i didn't delay the flight and it was just nice la...caught my breath at the AFT and then waited for awhile before i went to help out in the cabin...must quickly expedite boarding ma...when we finally got back to our seats, i managed to ask haslina who was the one..it was our "ALL TIME FAVOURITE" MS SHAVIRA!!! everyone's well known icon in TR!! haslina called her in the morning to ask her help to sign on...then when she heard her voice, like something not right...ya lor, she overslept..it was like 620am their reporting and shavira was like still sleeping la..that pig lor really...argh!!! then nevermind make some lame excuse...452 was not bad la..team work here and there...service was fast...express...only managed to sell 3 bottles of water...lols..nobody buys de ma...plus ya man, flask wasn't uplifted la...but lucky lor..no hot drinks...hee...

good and smooth for the first two la...when we reached SIN, captain keong asked us to get off of the a/c and ask to join the pilots for makan...so nice of him la...bought food for us...never lor a captain that ever buys food for us except those nice ones like uncle george, ricky and chad(captain to be =D ) the rest, nah...aiya, TR ma...what to do...lols...makan liao then went back to a/c started boarding...good la...but was delayed la due to this stupid pax la...delayed our flight, basket!!! late liao nevermind, kpkb that he insisted he paid for row 13A and 13B (apparently these 2 seats were bought by them and these seats were the ones that has bigger leg room) gf kept quiet but bf kpkb then after that gf join in the fun wth la...=.=" but then who to blame?? yourself lor!! farkers!!! you know what the departutre time was, we were already in the midst of looking at your baggages to offload them(meaning to say to get rid of them and leave them behind or to take the next connecting flight) just because they made it in time cuz' at that point of time, we were all waiting for the flask to arrive...they were just plain lucky lor...=.=" still make so much noise...jolly well know you're late, won't paiseh one lei...wa, never ever seen a person's face so thick skinned lor!!! wth...argh!! want refund la this la that la...fark la!! never blame yourself for being late but us for letting other pax to be seated at your seats...we offered to change back..but they said it's ok what's done, done...then what you want us to do...change back to your seat you don't want, then complain so much for??? argh!!!

coming back, even worse...don't want to talk about it...stupid lor...this flight really suay la...argh!! but nevermind, for me, i can be back early so i shouldn't be complaining...haha..i'm not really suay la...cuz after flight, i didn't want to take uncle steven de...then wendy was asking around who wants to share cab back...call uncle steven lor..then after that i went to buy my FBT shorts (which apparently i got the longer shorts instead of those shorter ones shits!!) then went to change into my home clothes and just nice wendy called to ask where i was...quickly changed and move on to MAC outside...saw them sitting there...wen waiting for uncle, haslina waiting for bf...so ok lor...ended up i decided to take uncle la...cuz' i'm too lazy to walk outside take bus, squeeze with people then can't sleep, get some rest & can't even sit..so nevermind la...take uncle plus os long never see him liao...guess what la, ain't i god damn lucky!!! after sending wendy home, uncle hungry liao...i was too la...told my brother to ask my dad to buy my dinner too but it was too late so nevermind...i don't mind eating with him la...he's just like a dad to me, taking care of my stomach lols...he ordered dim sum, my favourite tom yam fried fish soup with rice omg la!! i finished the whole thing...uncle was stunned i could finish so much =D i really know how to eat lor..what a glutton i am!!! lols...after eating talked lor..guess what then suddenly i just want uncle to buy 4D...lols..talked about the numbers and everything...i guess i just buy tomorrow too...just play play only la...not really serious..if really strike, buy something to offer the gods =D others, keep to buy a new labtop and a new camera and the rest, savings!! to make up for those amounts i've been spending like crazy lols...

and shits lor...asked sandy send me my aug roster cuz' i was just too lazy to get to my bro's room and check my roster, guess what..only a few days were changed for my flights on mon and wed...cuz' apparently these were the days i'm schooling lor..i dulan liao...emailed saleha lor...you plan roster, got mixed up with who my problem meh?? please la then now you can't finish your job making us suffer la...please, not all should suffer with you...you suffer alone cuz' it's not us that were at fault..you were to blame...so i just send her an email saying how tedious it was after school and how far i stay to travel to and fro...show you the email...

hi saleha,
it's me again melissa here..

regarding about the roster, only some were changed for the flight the rest i'm still rostered for flights...kak, i don't mind not earning but i just want my day off on school because it's really really tiring if i were to report for flight..the other time when it was like that, i really had difficulties as i'm not staying very near you see...i need to bring my stuff to school and do nothing at the terminal before reporting for flight...and school starts at 9am..i have to wake up at like 6am and 7am to get prepared to go to school..so it's liike as if the whole day burnt just like that...it's really tiring..hope you do understand..

i know you have difficulties allocating crew on the other flights but i'm really sorry..i wished to help but it's really tough to juggle it like that..we do need rest too..else, we will be mentally and physically drained and our minds will definitely react slower than the other crews we are working with in terms of safety..

do seek your understanding kak..

thanks a lot, really greatly appreciated..

melissa 5008

hmm...ya man that's about all la...tired liao...argh!! just praying hard that roster changes...

penning off here =D sweet dreams...

i am looking forward to my birthday..
especially next year...
i just wished time can pass quickly and
just stop there =D hee...
our holiday trip!!!
=D yay!! finally one!!!

happy

2009-07-22T00:50:00.021+08:00

14th July'09

this was the best and last day where we wore our old uniform..lols...it sucked la...wearing the new one...seriously i so much preferred the old one..it's like something is missing somewhere in the whole attire..but who cares la...what the company gives is what we wear...i simply love the pants but as for the top, it sucked big time!!! i was thinking, just thinking, why couldn't we just get a dress...like what jetstar is having..it's really nice lor..unlike ours..that's actually what a cabin crew's uniform should be ma...well, nevermind, i shall not complain...i'm left with like less than 9months and i'm off man!!! so i shall not complain!!! pictures for the last day of donning the old uniform...but seriously i missed it so badly la..really!! cuz' the old one is so much comfortable!!!

from left, faizal, aslinda & tara

20th July '09

i went out with DD =) it was a great day out although time spent was really short...hee =D i had a great time with him yesterday...was a little unexpected for the chocolate treat =D

actually i was nua-ing the whole morning..he went to jb after work...while for me i went home straight after work...i was doing 638 the night before...it was really shag la...but i'm alright to tag along to jb..cuz' it was about 8am or was it 9am when i got back, was thinking if we were to meet then i just skip breakfast, bathed and just head down to meet him for jb..since no other girls was going, i just stayed at home to get ample rest la...lols...yeah man...breakfast was great!! i had the croissant from work for breakfast and heated it up with an extra cheese and instant corn soup..i was just letting the croissant to heat up in the oven while i get a bath haha...woots man!! it was indeed sumptuous!!! after that, i went to bed!!! haha..fancy sleeping at 10am in the morning lols...best part, DD gave me like 33 miss calls...it was from the time he got back...i really don't know what went wrong with my cell...it didn't vibrate to wake me up...even my alarm didn't rang...argh!!! stupid cell!!! well, immediately when i got up, i was like...i think i had been sleeping for like very long...first reaction, look at my cell...omg!!! 33 miss calls!! lols..quickly got up called DD..decided to meet and just go out...

my initial planning was to just go out, anywhere will do but just to go out and have fun...just anywhere will do..i just didn't like the idea of staying at home la...ya so after that, we headed to city hall...haha...DD wanted to catch the singapore flyer...but i just didn't have the mood la..so yeah man, i told him to just go there to look lor...went to marina to have my dinner...i had tom yam ban mian...i tell you la, the best tom yam noodles is still the one here back home..it's the best...i've tried every place's tom yam noodles but none of them tasted just like the ones here at teck whye...it's the soup that matters man...it soup really sucks to the core back at marina...the ones here at teck whye is the best...even DD said so =D yeah!!! really la...none tasted as good la..lols...in fact the one in marina spoiled my appetite so bad that i just wanted to have desert lor...how great...and the desert sucked too...it's almond jelly with longan...my brother's almond jelly is still the best la...can never compare to my brother's!!! lols...i somehow missed it la...haha..talking about that, i've yet to get him any present for his 16th...=X

ya then we decided to shop lor..since we're not going to singapore flyer...lols...cuz' before that we just wanted to have buffet and then head home..but ended up we preferred food court cuz' it was so much better than buffet...lols..but guess what, ended up it's the other way round...the food sucked at the food court and on second thoughts, the ones at the buffet was much worth lols..nevermind...lols...headed to window shop at royal sporting house...i tried a cap and it was the first time that a cap can ever fit into my big head la!! it was the FIRST ever time man!! and it fitted in nicely...hee...was so proud...DD wanted to buy it for me but i was thinking...if he were to buy it then when can i wear it...it's not that i'm a cap person lols...by the way we saw joanne peh while we were taking the escalator to the buffet...she's really chio la...haha..skinny also!!! haha...

hmm...then after that shop, DD said he wanted to bring me to a place..so we went over back to the esplanade =D he brought me to max brenner...a famous chocolate shop...show you the pictures man!! lols...and and!! we had chocolate fondue =D yay!!! omg la..it's so so sinful!!! i must've gobbled like 20kg worth of fats in my tummy lols...but it was really good la...simply indulging in it!!! savouring and enjoying every moment...hee hee..

after the whole session of indulgence, we went up to the rooftop to take a breather...lols...DD wanted to show me the newly opened bar that was at the rooftop...it was really cosy la...haha...nice...not bad...but i still preferred the scenery at the rooftop..heh heh...took some pictures too =D

21st July'09

went to zerlina's birthday chalet with adele...i met DD after he ended his work...he was really tired...i appreciated the thought that he came despite being tired...else i wouldn't go too...but i have already promised zerlina that i'll be going..so it's not really nice to not turn up right?? so ya...initially we just wanted to head there straight since i don't know what time adele's hubby will be ending work...she called la...so i was thinking, accompany her lor...then we alighted at clarke quay to do some last minute birthday present shopping lols...got it and just nice, her hubby was done...he came to pick us all up and all 4 of us headed to coasta sands..the one she had last year except this one was very near the entrance..lols...chatted, caught up with times...lols...sang her birthday song...oh my!! she really slimmed down a lot lor...haha...it's really good to see her la...it's been so so long since i last saw her...about a year liao...lols...glad that she found her love one...lols...adele's hubby sent us back which was very nice of him to do so =D we saved on cab and at least DD doesn't need to walk so far....he's really tired i can tell..but he kept saying it's ok just to make me happy...i know it...=D thanks DD!! muackz!!! just can't wait to see him tomorrow!!!

hope my new roster for aug is not going to be screwed...lols...i just want more off days!!! the one that was out i think has to be redone cuz' i'm still studying ma..saleha got me mixed up with olivia when she planned the roster..she thought i was the one wanting to opt out for studies...no lor..i won't, not even over my dead body!! siao la...last module liao opt what out..crazy!!! jiayou!!! lols...

thanks so much for the days,

you really made me happy!!

thanks for cheering me up,

despite how bad my temper was,

perhaps during that few days,

i was really lonely,

mom nagging...

that was why i flared up like almost everyday..

but you were there,

listening to me,

not giving me up,

being there to "sayang" me patiently

despite my attitude!!

i see so much in you...

was really stupid...

but i supposed i had enough fun..

it's time to settle down =D

I LOVE YOU!!

random

2009-07-18T18:18:00.003+08:00

woots!!! looking at the past posts of my blog, i can clearly see the change in me...haha

but then i realised something my face!!! it has gone worse!!! if you guys do notice the difference, it was like yeah man, my face hor without make up also can lor...now ah, make up is a must before i go out...except for some time la...haha...if there's like no pimples maybe still ok lor..but now, my face is disastrous!!!

i remembered that time when i just started training, all of my batch mates feels that my face is good...like good complexion and everything...haha..so happy...even some of my seniors also...cuz' i always remove all my make up after flight la...lols...

now lei...lols...go take a look at my pictures from my previous posts on my blog and you can tell the difference..lols..

JUST SHUT THE FARK UP!!!

2009-07-18T16:25:00.007+08:00

shit!! as the title says it all..it's farking noisy...i'm so sorry for the vulgarities i have to use...

argh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

why is it that my parents are so farking different!! especially my mother!!! i just wish that i had parents who are so nice!!

does laundry, cooks, packs your stuff, understands that you are tired after work and stuff...

my mother???

fark it man!!! fark!! it's farkin shit i tell you!!! damn!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i am so seriously angry and pissed...whatever that you call it!! once she got home, she started it!!! nag and nag!! just shut the fark up la!! i don't know whether i've owned her in my previous life...i seriously don't need my parents lor really!!! i can be that independent!! since young, i already so used to it!! no matter what i do, in their eyes, i'm always the one that's the BAD child...i still remember when i was at my old home back in bukit gombak where it was a massionate..eh i don't know how to spell it...it's like those house where there are two floors...i used to hide at the corner near the stairs just to watch tv at night...cuz' my study room's downstairs, my bedroom's upstairs...i have to act like the very "HARDWORKING" one to study and then go to sleep early upstairs...so ya, pretend like i'm sleeping and went up but was just sitting near the stairs to watch tv...sigh...when anyone walks past, i have to move or so called run further up to hide...once the coast is clear then only i move back to the place to watch tv..it's very tough to sit there and watch cuz' it's like cramped, uncomfortable blah blah...you know la...

the first time when i got my menses, it wasn't my mother who taught me about girl's stuff, it was my MAID...imagine that!! a mother not teaching a daughter what to do...WTH!!! sigh...i really farking hate my mother since i was young...no doubt she gave life to me, suffered all the pain to just give birth to me, i do appreciate that!! but why?? the way she talked to my brother and the way she talks to me are totally different!!! even my primary school friend SHEENA who came over to ask my brother for help in her photoshop thing last year, felt that way...it's so obvious...at first, i thought it was me who thought about it too much..but NO!! even my friend said so!! it's proven!!!

FARK my life man!! really...during the time when i got my N level results, i didn't want to retain and start all over again!! i farking know myself damn farking well!!! don't want to listen nevermind, force me to retain..what the hell la!! i just want to go on to ITE to take a course i want cuz' it's like my grades aren't so bad lor..just that i got 11points and couldn't make it to sec5 which was the 10points...shit la!! plus you know what?? i farking pass my maths lor..i got a B4 lor...from the way i studied and stuff, i couldn't possibly pass it cuz' i flunk almost every subject in school...not really fail but like just pass or maybe slightly better, 60% like that lor...other than my F&N i couldn't do well in the other subjects...it's so amazing that i passed almost everything in my Ns lor...really!! i wasn't sad that i couldn't move on to sec5 but i thought it as a good way where god's letting me unleash my potential in ITE perhaps...although i was disappointed in myself that i couldn't move on...but no, i take it positively...

retained and got like an 8points which was like so farking waste of time lor!! cb!! move on to sec5, so what??? struggle like mad!! which i already saw this coming...everything was massive...just so suddenly...i admit i'm a slow learner..but slow in studies...i excel in hands on...that gave the reason why i did perfectly well for my F&N!! and please la, doing something that i like or have passion in, definitely i'll put 101% effort in it...i'll top the level and everything...TRUST ME MAN i will!! just like my grades for F&N...don't want to listen lor...make me walk such a big round and ended up going back to ITE!! where i could've gotten a scholarship or something and completing my first year!! wtf man!! sigh...failed Os nevermind...got like 26++ points...no poly wants me...so i hecked...then mum saw this ad in classifieds...that's how i got into tiger...sigh!!

regretted man!! my time in secondary school...why didn't i insisted!!! my mum was supportive of me to go into ITE as it was something i like to do...then she sided my dad...cuz' my dad's impression on ITE was like bad eggs, smoking blah blah...but i believe that if a person wants to learn bad, the person will eventually be bad...if the person has discipline, there's no way a person will turn bad!! so what's with the mentality that all students in ITE are bad eggs...students from there also excelled!! they got scholarship, topped the cohort, the school and some were given opportunities to study in reputable UNI...it's like what's so wrong to go to ITE...rather than what i'm doing now, wasting of time...sigh....it was just so wrong la..

everything in my farking life just doesn't seem to go well...is god punishing me for the sins i've done in my previous life?? i know i am thinking too much...but why is it that my mother treats me so differently??

another incident...i remembered there was once where i fainted in giordano(my previous workplace then) and was carried by DD to the clinic at CCK..was diagnosed that i was anaemic...i was like wth....when i went to see the doctor, i asked him, none of my family members has a history of that...when i left my medication where the other medicines are (that's where we have this little corner in the kitchen to put medication) she noticed it...it was my brother who told me that she had low blood pressure when she was younger...AGAIN!! fark!! it was again that wasn't said from her mouth to me...why is it that everything has to be out from someone else's mouth...why??? fark!!! i hate it!!! argh!!! does she even cared about me?? there was also another incident...was quite recent...last year...i had gastric and my low blood pressure came back..i went to the doctor's to check what happened to myself..guess what she said?? go fake MC again ah??? i was like thinking please lor this kinda thing fake what...as if low blood and gastric can fake!!! wth!!! then continue nagging...wa so many medication...waste money...there are still more medicines in the fridge what...why waste money to see doctor and get another new set of medications?? those in the fridge also haven't finish...i was like WTF!!!!! like HELLO?? THIS IS YOUR DAUGHTER YOU'RE SPEAKING TO!!! NOT SOME OUTSIDER!! fark la...now you see what i mean...

i'm not saying that i hate my brother cuz' i used to do that when i was younger...i don't blame my brother for all that..in the past i was childish but now, i've been understanding and besides, i want the best for my brother...i'd rather he gets everything that's best for him...anyways i'm already like CUI liao...sucked at studies, in life everything a failure...unlike him...he has a better future, outstanding grades...so ya...i'd rather he gets the best!! but i'm just quite upset that we are both birthed by my mother, why is it that she treats my brother well but not me?? if my brother is sick, wa, she'll go buy food for him blah blah...ask him see a doctor (not taking expired medications) sigh...so unfair...that led me to hate my brother when i was younger...

but fark!! what is this!!! i barely get a day off like today..it was supposed to be sby la..but i didn't get called so it's considered off...plus tomorrow i'm doing india...it's like i'll be freaking tired lor...auntie lilian also understands what i'm going through la...know that flying is tiring all that...need time to rest and stuff...my mother??? why is it that others have to tell me things but not my OWN FARKING MOTHER?!!?!?!?? fark la...just fark lor...at least my dad does bother about me...fetching me to work despite the wee hours in the morning...he's nice...afraid i was hungry when i was in school the last time...everything...but seriously, i'd rather the amount i'm giving my mother to give all of them to my dad...cuz' giving to her is akin to nothing!!! for me i treat it as paying off my bills and everything..but as for my dad, i just treat it as giving him the cash...100 is enough lor for bills and everything...it's not as if i earn heaps of thousands that i can give so much...if i can give within my means i will...plus who doesn't need daily necessities?? tell me?? of course i need to buy them...cosmetics is a must for my job..and if i don't buy them, what am i going to tell my company?? clothes too...i need new clothes for going out, going to school...i can't possibly wear the same thing for consecutive a few days??? like duh?? what will people think of me..

argh!!! eveyrthing is so not right in my life...

if i ever earn lots, i really want to move out...i'm FARKING SERIOUS!! anyone wants to join?? go rent an apartment of something lor...live on my own, pay my own bills and everything so i can stop hearing things i don't wish to hear!!!

please lor, just because you think you're the sole breadwinner of this family, don't push your luck too much lor...don't push me hor i tell you!! if i blast i tell you, you'll regret it!! don't make yourself regret what you say cuz' i'll really move out and fan lian lor!!! i know she's working hard to make ends meet...supporting the family for all these years and not complaining even a little bit...everything she does it's for us...our studies and stuff...if not for her i won't be able to get into tiger too cuz' of the bond thing...with 8K you see...even if i can use my savings to tong that...but of course, i'm still afraid la...but ya, so what?? even though earning that much, can cause you to like boss everyone around?? what did you do when you get back?? at least for some other families like my cousin's, their mom does go to work like those 8-5 but when they are back, they still does the laundry, cooks and everything a mother should do...my mom??? wtf!!! argh!!! just fark it la...i'm, getting so sick and tired of this house!!! everytime when i'm back, i have this fear that she'll nag!! i had enough already lor...really enough!!! i just wished that i can be deaf!! really deaf so that i can't hear anything but just see her mouth nagging...isn't it great???sigh...whatever la...i don't care and don't want to bother anymore!!! i don't give a fark liao really!!!

that's why this year's mothers' day i didn't even bother to celebrate...not in the mood...i can't be bothered liao...just heck lor...that's what i can say!!! i hate her and i really FARKING HATE HER TO THE CORE!!! it's like she's not my mother lor...i'm still doubting whether i'm her real daughter?? even my 21st birthday, she didn't bother to celebrate...i have to plan everything myself...sigh...sad la...really...

i suppose everyone's 21st is like the most memorable ba...with everyone celebrating with you, cutting of cake, getting so many wonderful presents...what about me?? haha..when i tell people, i'm bound to be a laughing stock!!!!! like WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA you know???

nobody was there...it was only i gathered my cousins along that i got a proper BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION...check out my post for my birthday...7th january this year...go see man...sigh...

she thinks i don't want to clear my room?? i'm just plain lazy i admit...why??? cuz' i'm too tired to do anything!!! i know my room's in a farking mess...you ask my company to give me more off days then...told you my room is farking small...from the time we moved in, i told you i wanted my brother's room..what did you tell me?? fark!!! and i think my brother doesn't need a big room lor..fark!! i just want to clear the whole damn room!!! i really want to!!! but look, i need time...i need my other off days...if i was given 2 off days straight, i wouldn't mind packing...but to give me a day work, a day off, how can i??? tell me?!?!?! fark!!! argh!!! shit la!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!

life ain't gonna be easy but no matter what i have to try...

no matter how many falls i've taken,

i still want to move on...

it's not for the sake of it but because of the first step i let my foot on...

the desire in my heart will just make me persevere!!

jiayou then melissa!!

sigh!!!

woots!! what a day..i didn't study shit!!

2009-07-11T19:44:00.023+08:00

day out with the brothers in camp!!

from left, melvin, ross, gerald

we were supposed to meet up for tanning...it was a last minute thing for me to join...gerald was super late la!! after school i was bored..just went to meet them lor...nice group of people..they are younger than me..but their mentality aren't their age...i must say, IMPRESSIVE!! anyways, back to the story, it poured heavily so we went to catch a movie instead..movie was boring...lols..but i got it after the climax was coming...cuz' apparently all of us didn't know what was going on..lame show..the couple quarrelled, kissed then bedded...wth la...lols...ended up they thought they got the formula for quite a hefty sum but it was a fraud..lols...lame!!! i just feel that it's wasting of time..we thought it was some interesting show...wanted to catch ice age 3 but it was full house so that was like the best available time slot for us otherwise other movies will be like 9 plus...so ya...lols...great day shopping...it was like my first time experience on how guys shopped...didn't know how it felt like...and i didn't know guys do shop lor..lols...great bunch of people i knew...they are just younger brothers to me =D and it was a coincidence that one of them had the same name as my younger brother...lols...we had fun and i was the photographer of the day...very little pictures of me la...duh!! cuz' i'm the photographer...and please lor..don't see melvin like that..lols...when it comes to photo taking, he's full of nonsense la...cuz' all the while when we were chatting, he's quiet, playing my touch..but then when it comes to photos!! omg la...can't believe it...we were laughing our heads out man..lols...UNBELIEVABLE!!! LOLS

10th july' 09 (shopping day)

she's wiping her mucus away lols..

did you see a ghost?? lols

someone's promoting her cell.. i know la cool don't make me jealous can??

my loots of the day

her bag is so empty can??

really bought a lot!!

nice shot right??

look at those sexy thighs lols =X

sandy's disgusting tissue!!

guess who's

was fixing her bikini..she's too hawt that it dropped =X

i super love this can???
mine: white
sandy's: yellow

it was definitely a great day out with her...we had fun laughing at the girl who shared table with us and her bf...her voice la, seriously cannot make it!! i don't know want to laugh or what...and you know what?? when i was ordering another plate of rice, she was like SHOCKED!! wth..i can eat what i want..cuz' i was hungry what...cannot meh?? diao...but i had fun la!! love you sis!! we shall go shopping again!!! lols...

oh shit la..supposed to study but i didn't i guess i'll have intensive study tomorrow and no more going out!!! woots!!!

true friends are forever..
pictures are memories..
what is it that everyone is searching for??

shopping day

2009-07-11T03:02:00.003+08:00

it was declared as SHOPPING day with sandy today =D

so happy!!! bought so many stuff!! not really many but i've spent quite a bit...shits!! meaning i'm really gonna eat grass liao...i have the balance to last for the end of the month...need to stop spending man!! woots!!

here are the loots i've gotten today..

bought 2 sundresses at a steal man!! it's really cheap lor...a pair of heels...a bikini (the first thing to buy la..also don't know why lols..) and my new perfume...ANNA SUI hee =D...nothing much right but...wait till you hear the total bill...bill's like $140+ shit la!! not including what i ate man!! all within a day...it's gone!! omg!!! i've been spending lots man...then supper at bukit timah!! i had porridge!! what's good for sick people!! lols...

2 sick girls going out shopping is really so uncomfortable!! i've got cough from san and she's got flu from me lols...it's like we fall sick on the same day and back to the same day shopping, we got each other's sickness...lols...how great...and i'm having fever now which is shit...she used up like 2 packets of tissue la!! lols...then bought a few packets from the auntie when we were walking towards paragon lols...i'd better get well man!! if not i can forget earning $100 on sun...i can kiss it goodbye...shits!! need to work more and less MC...taken quite a bit for the year...

i didn't know why la...i was feeling ok when i was out...my flu has gotten better..my nose wasn't runny at all...but then when i got home...shit!! it came back...if that's the case, i'd rather go out than to stay at home man...argh!!! it's really irritating!! all these sickness are a link...if you either got the flu bug, next thing it'll be cough and vice versa...then followed by fever..shits!! hated it man!! although it's good that i can stay at home..but then, it's really bad...i don't want to get quarantined again!!! how sad!!!

well, tomorrow for me is standby...i really do hope nobody calls me up...as i really want to study hard for my exams on mon...woots!! even though it's only a day i'm sure i can make it ba jiayou!!

i'm just finding it weird..

why do people avoid people..

answer me...

sick sick sick...*achoooo

2009-07-10T13:40:00.015+08:00

9th July '09, yesterday

flight was GOOD!! with huiwen and daphne!!! it's always us three...was together with another junior crew..the latest batch...she thought she knew everything lor!!! i wanted to teach her how to operate on the POS system for fear that she might've forgotten out of goodwill la...diao...she doesn't like it when i teach her...as if she knows everything..fine..

i remember my days as a junior..i didn't dared to talk back or when a senior is teaching me something, i didn't dared interrupt or said i know...it's wise to keep quiet and just listen rather than you talked back cuz' you know what's in for you later....

sigh...juniors coming in now have all changed...i missed the days where those seniors who have left la taught the juniors...and they wouldn't dared to talk back...i think now, it all seems so useless la...argh!! nevermind man!! it's alright...

it was a good flight la at least i can do some catching up with daphne!! heard lots from huiwen that my batch mate....ya...sigh..why must they do such things...it's like another 10 months and you can leave here..but now...doing stupid things to jeopardize your bond...how stupid!! well they intend to leave some time back la...so ya....

after flight went to catch a movie!!

The Haunting In Connecticut!!

woots!! thumbs up man!! it wasn't really scary la..just that the sound effects that's what is making it scary!! i remembered during a part where Matt was behind his mom, it was so funny can!!! this guy like screamed!!! everyone in the theatre laughed out so loudly not because of the movie but the guy that laughed!! so funny can!! lols..how can a guy be scared la!!! lols...come to think of it, it was really FUNNY!!!! hahahaha!!! by the way, it was based on a true story!! it was quite sad for the aickmans..really...especially that guy who got burnt to death...so sad...do watch it man!! 5stars for this!! haha...

was really happy that you came down yesterday..thanks =D

10th july '09, today

meeting my dear sister sandy!!! hope she's not late wahahahahaha...can really be friends with gerald la..the late kings and queens...SHOPPING today!! hope i do get some good loots!! haha...

am so sick la...sneezing the first i did when i woke up...and it was like continuos...shit...i just hope i won't take any MC else i'll be eating grass liao lor...argh!!!

below were some pictures i took on tuesday..wanted to upload it on tuesday but there were some problems with blogger that i didn't why which didn't allowed me to upload them...they were pictures of SINGAPORE, KL AND BANGKOK...those were during cruising level, after take off and upon descending...nice pictures and i love them!!!

after take off from SIN to KL

KL upon descend...

take off from KL to SIN

cruising to SIN

upon descend to SIN

i love it..the clouds especially!!

cruising from SIN to BKK

upon landing into BKK

cruising from SIN to BKK

these were what we call turbulence!!!

it's what that caused the plane to have "bumps"

lols

upon landing into BKK

cruising from BKK to SIN

lovely clouds!! wheeee...

taken when pax were disembarking..

funny la weina!!

you actually wanted to cam-whore when we were going back soon

lols..

that gives the smirks on our faces lols...

we did have fun despite the CIC...

stupid lor..putting blame on us..

.argh!!

i won't forget TUESDAY!!!

misses..

2009-07-08T22:26:00.006+08:00

hmm..yesterday was kinda emo...i don't know la!! don't want to talk about it...talking about it makes me want to cry AGAIN!!

i'm falling sick!! sigh..really...i think it's all thanks to yesterday's crying =(

already i am having slight sore throat and later in the evening i had slight flu...keep sneezing...sigh...tomorrow i've got work..can't take mc..plus i've not been working due to...you know...sigh...and now, this has to happen..falling sick at this time...shits!! having headache too...

seriously, i want to thank people who has been talking to me, cheering me up listening to me when i'm so so down!!

*you guys should know who i'm talking about*

to the person who told me that went down to have supper for 45mins and was done like 20mins, i'm really very very touched!! i heard the fast footsteps when you were on the line with me and was walking like damn fast back home just to come online..and making sure that i was feeling ok, message another friend of mine to check on me and cheer me up...and also waited and chatted with me till i slept...i'm REALLY TOUCHED!! and the one that morning called me, i didn't expect you did gave me one cuz' i didn't asked you to...but you initiated it yourself =D really glad and happy la..really...=D

i don't want to mention names..it's not as if names represent anything..but being annoymous would be better =D mysterious!! cuz' you guys know who are the ones that were there for me...

i think it's like the first ever time you guys ever heard me cry ba!! so embarassing...that sucky voice of mine...lols...stupid sob sob sounds...but you guys didn't mind totally!! still say don't mention it cuz' that's what friends are for...to be there when you're down...ya here i am talking about friends and more friends...nothing about him..but i'm really thankful that god made me find them...although i know them through clubbing i really am happy that i've got such wonderful friends who shower their care and concern for me!!

i sincerely apologise to you guys for your lack of sleep...cuz' you guys all got things to do the next day while i can just slack at home and do nothing as there wasn't school!! but you guys didn't mind!! thanks!!

to you guys who are reading this:
seriously, my life has changed with you around!! i really am happy that i've found you!! i treasure the many memories we once had and if i were to breathe the last, i really didn't regret knowing you guys in the first place...it was all FATE!! god led us to this path and let us be friends =D and i'm glad we did cross each other's path...you were there through thick and thin with me...didn't blame me and was all the while there, being really patient...trying to cheer me up...i guess i should be fine for now...but THAT thing is still bothering me...i really hate myself for being like that seriously!! you finally saw the weaker side of me which was like so embarassing!! i only knew you for like less than a few months...and yet you were there for me =D

words can't express my gratitude to you!! but i really need to hang out with you again and give you ONE BIG AND TIGHT HUG!!! that's for sure!!

if you are reading this:
thanks for the breakfast and the time for accompanying me...*loves

i guess it's all about me now!! what i'm going to do right now!! i need to be strong!! i really need to!! i can't fall and crumble at times like this...it will make things worse..but how...MELISSA!! you've got to be stronger than any other day as time passes...jiayou!! ignore things which are not worth in YOUR life!! MEL, YOU CAN DO IT!!

seriously, i started to miss..
to miss that few days we spent time together...
am looking through the pictures...
although there are very few on that day..
i really miss the days..
i want it to come back..
i want to see you everyday..
i do hope you got the hint...
i need you!!
*loves

talking about my health, i'm getting weaker..i don't know what's going on...head spins are very very frequent...blackouts in my vision very often...the doctor said i have a weak heart...but it is true that it has gone weaker?? or rather so fragile that you just do something to make me really sad, it'll just shatter into many tiny little pieces?? i need strength..i need unconditional love and care...i really do...please love me as i'm going insane soon!!

melissa is getting sick and weaker with each passing day...she needs lots of love and care from that special someone...and you know it!!

shit the first day of work

2009-07-07T21:02:00.007+08:00

what a day!!! it's supposed to be a good flight...i took so many good pictures almost every sector!! i just love the sky!! it's so good...

it was initially the best flight la...all seniors...i've just like started work only today!! plus weina and me were figuring out how to use the POS system..we're all eager to learn...nothing special really...kinda fun!! and it's easy la...just a little mixed up at times...plus there were more items in the cart now!! yay!! at least there are more things to sell than those things in cart the last time...people do buy more on shorter flights=more sales..the duty-free cart also has more stuff to sell...and they made a booklet just for the items that they are selling..it's really good i tell you!! some hot stuff...

i didn't know that our airline has bloomed...finally!! it has bloomed through the years of hardwork...at least i do feel proud to be part of the TIGER family...it's like the whole airline with the new look it's really good!! the POS system, the NEW UNIFORM (i can't wait to wear it) and the new booklet of stuff for our duty free items and more new stuff being uplifted in both the f&b and the DFS cart =D it's like TIGER has "upgraded" liao...no more labeling the worst in the budget airline...yay!!

hmm..talking about what happened on my first day of work..it was smooth and pleasant..although weina and me didn't know how to operate the POS system..it was like our "VIRGIN" day on operating it la..so we're blurred with the new items in carts, the POS system on how to use it...it's a cool gadget i tell you...but i'm getting used to it..it's good!! and easy!! i've mastered it!!

sigh..i just don't know la...been feeling down these few days...i don't know why...

what is it that i'm searching for?? what is it that i really really want?? sigh...i have been thinking lots these few days!!

what the hell am i doing...what is it that's messing me up? what am i doing that's making me so miserable...

if only time could be like how it was in the club...

where the music just spins and

i'm there on the podium dancing...

sigh...

i seriously need a break or a getaway...i want to travel the world with you!!

argggghhhhh

2009-07-05T22:05:00.003+08:00

i think i seriously have problems now...

i'm mad!!

i can't sleep..

i can't eat properly..

sigh...

what the hell is wrong with me?!?!?!!?

is this depression??

but what am i depressed about??

sigh...

is it work??

or what is it??

sigh...

well...i've not been eating well these days..

i know i am hungry...and i mean REALLY HUNGRY that kind...

then i just like waited la...maybe due to laziness that is...

after that when food comes, i'm like yay...eating happily...

for a moment it actually is temporary...as in just like that lor...hungry for just that moment and after that anything in my mouth, i'll just feel like puking!!!

yesterday, while on the way to powerhouse, i was like damn hungry after ktv...then went ahead with mac and after that eating on the cab itself...finished the fries and i felt like puking!!! continued on with the burger...i ate like half and that's it...i feel like puking liao...then after we alighted i just threw away the other half burger lor...finished my milo then went in..sigh..

so tell me now what's wrong...

then now i'm like so hungry again...should i eat or should i just drink water...

but then drinking water at night will cause bloatedness man...sigh how how..

weeeee

2009-07-05T19:18:00.004+08:00

yesterday was a blast at powerhouse...really...went to TOP ONE at bugis...it sucked really...not very good...i still prefer KBOX or PARTYWORLD...it has limited songs la...not really good...but nevermind la...then after ktv we head down to powerhouse!! it was a blast la...really!!! so many people!! with damn superb music!! crowd was good too...i think in my chiong-ing life that was like the best can!!! lols...i was so amazed by myself too that i can danced throughout once i stepped on the podium itself...

it was too packed..i was looking for amos to say hi la...but then couldn't find him and he was like very near our side...so i had this clever idea...just stood up the podium would be good la...cuz' that's where i can see the whole club clearly...true enough yeah!! amos waved!! said hi lols..then i continued dancing...wanted to go down but no la...preferred to stay up there lols..it was so great!! the fan was like blowing in the direction...lols...asked canice to come up and she agreed too...lols...then i stood there to dance throughout la...lols...great exercise la...lols...i'm so amazed myself also that i actually did that lols...heck care man!! lols...music was really good la unlike wed...lols...woots!! cheers to DJ KZEE!!! lols..too happening liao..i supposed it's those peeps who's supposed to go butter factory la...immigrants from butter factory we call it!!! and people from phuture coming there as well...friends said that phuture wasn't that good...music sucks, crowd sucks!!! lols..i wonder what's happening man...so many people coming to powerhouse!!! and the problem was when we got stuck outside, there were still people wanting to come in omg!!! as in not the re-entry...the normal queue where you need to pay...still got people at like 2am lor...this was like crazy...powerhouse was overly packed la!!! haha..went back quite early la...afraid that i won;t get a cab...cuz' by then people will be taking cab lor if i were to go when it's about to close..so i'd rather take it early lols...but it was great la the music!!!

doing nothing the whole day again today...and thank god i wasn't activated for the weekends!! it was great!! which was really rare!! cuz' usually they'll call lor..but i was thanking god la for making just the whole week off!!! it's great la...really but i did nothing besides club and ktv-ing lols..really nua the whole week la...shits!!! like i told myself i shall not do it but then no i'm still doing it...what the hell am i doing man!!! am mad at myself!!! argh!!!

the last day to NUA!!!

2009-07-03T13:46:00.003+08:00

lols...as the title says so..shit la, it's my last day to nua at home..sigh...just hope that this doesn't just stop here...but life still has to go on..work is my life...no work=no pay...plus i've not been working la..so yeah man...my pay definitely sucks!!! lols.. can eat grass...wahaha..

tomorrow's standby and sunday too...=.=" super sian can!! i'd rather they give me work...but till now i'm going to sleep soon, they still have yet to call!! of course i wouldn't be wanting to call logistics to ask la..but then if they activate me, i wouldn't mind cuz' if i have a morning flight, at the very least i can go somewhere later in the day man...else the day would be wasted just like today lor...lols...but nevermind la..if they never call, they BETTER NOT CALL!! lols...=X

today i spent the whole day doing nothing AGAIN!!! lols...but nevermind...talked to sandy the whole day...haha...loads loads of stuff man!!! and i seriously LOVE HER!!!

sis, if you're reading this, thanks man!! you're really good la, encouraging me and stuff!! thanks la!!! i love you!!!!

lols...well, we both have been trying to cut down on club...but come to think of it, we stick to going there like once or twice a month...which is good...not too good to be addictive...i remembered how i used to club like mad man!!! lols...wahaha...ya but then kinda getting bored soon la...haha...the crowd perhaps...it's the most important factor...the music too...

oh yeah, found some good music!! woots!!! really good la...r&b remixes by DJ KZEE!!! woots!!! happy like mad can!!! lols...please, my dear sis kept saying she's fat...but she's really not la..really...compared to me i'm more bak lols...so sista stop complaining can!!! lols...we're so tempted to club tomorrow la...haha..sista!!! how how how!!! we try to resist!! lols...

hmm...exams i think are also coming soon man..plus these few days doing nothing at home, i really DID NOTHING LOR LOLS!!! hmm...how how...i've been so so lazy la...why man...really lor...stupid habit...kept procrastinating lor...kept telling myself tomorrow tomorrow...wth!!!! argh!!!! i just hate it and begining to hate myself to be so so damn lazy!!! argh!!! need to buck up la...shits!!! argh!!!! school also like that...never a time i wake up early except for exams i suppose..shit me la!!! lazy and lazier!! argh!!! stupid man...hmm..nevermind...just how many more months now...10 MORE MONTHS MAN!!!! just wished that it passes faster la!!! argh!! damn!!! now's july...soon the year's gonna be over!! and it's 2010!!!! yay!! haha...jiayou in counting down man!!! like taking forever la!!! argh!!!!

jiayou man!!!

presentation via the phone!!

2009-07-01T10:31:00.003+08:00

woots..finally i'm done with presentation and my assignment!! been working on it with my group members...wa...this is so good..i think another hurdle up will be the exams!! sigh and i'm still like abit.....got to read up ba...shall do some reading later...packing of room is the most important right now...i know you guys always hear me mentioning that...i can't seem to keep my room neat and tidy eh...lols...i've got too many things liao la..i suppose after my studies is completed, i'm just SO gonna throw every single thing away!! I PROMISE!!! cuz' there are just too many books piling up here and there...notes from secondary school days and some papers la...just need to discard them...i just wished my room is emtpy!!! lols...it's small so it looks cramp!! argh!! just need to discard those unnecessary items and do some shifting and it'll be spacious ba...i SO wanna get a sofa bed cuz' my bed is taking too much space la!!! argh..just hope when my brother's gonna get a bed, i'll just give mine to him so that i can spend on another sofa bed to keep my room spacious!!! i SERIOUSLY need lotsa space...it's so damn small...my table, my wardrobe!!! argh!!!

alright, i shall stop talking about it la...argh!! talking about it makes me go mad!! lols...cuz' i can never make my room neat and tidy..for a moment it's very clean and neat the next 2 days, it'll be the same old shit again lols..so ya...perhaps i can just find things the way it is now...not like it's packed cuz when it's packed i'll mess up the room again just to find it so i think that's why lols...

hmm..staying at home again...bored la..but at least i can get to stay at home doing nothing...it's like leave lor...good!!! lols..i'm begining to love this but then it's like sian...cuz' i'm going to work soon...argh...after this friday ends, school starts!! just hope it's like a breeze cuz' they are starting on the new system already...just hope i won't screw up anything la...yesterday was doing my nails the whole afternoon..was too bored already...pink nails with some white flowers...sweet hor?? no time to take pictures la...lazy lols...just see when i'll take em...before i remove them of course!! long time didn't do nail art le =D haha...used to do that when i was in giordano...every week you can see new nails =D lols...

hmm...shall be doing some cross stitching later after my room's cleared..lols...it's been there the whole time...if not i'll just watch some drama shows or to just play games lor...lols...slacking now...I LIKE!!! lols..

will update soon again i guess...haha...tata

something meaningful..

2009-06-28T13:34:00.008+08:00

Beautiful Lesson!!!!!!!!

The girl in the picture is Katie Kirkpatrick, she is 21. Next to her, her fiancé, Nick, 23.
The picture was taken shortly before their wedding ceremony, held on January 11, 2005 in the US .
Katie has terminal cancer and spend hours a day receiving medication.
In the picture, Nick is waiting for her on one of the many sessions of Chemo to end.

In spite of all the pain, organ failures, and morphine shots, Katie is going along with her wedding and took care of every detail. The dress had to be adjusted a few times due to her constant weight loss.

An unusual accessory at the wedding was the oxygen tube that Katie used throughout the ceremony and reception as well.
The other couple in the picture is Nick's parents. Excited to see there son marrying his high school sweetheart.

Katie, in her wheelchair with the oxygen tube, listening a song from her husband and friends

At the reception, Katie had to take a few rest breaks. The pain wouldn't allow her to stand up for long periods

Katie died five days after her wedding day. Watching a woman so ill and weak getting married and with a smile on her face makes us think..... Happiness is reachable, no matter how long it lasts. We should stop making our lives complicated.

Life is short ...
kiss passionately, love truly
laugh constantly
And never stop smiling
no matter how strange life is
Life is not always the party we expected to be
but as long as we are here, we should smile and be grateful.

i felt that this was rather meaningful..one of the few emails a friend had sent me..hmm...great story & very admirable..i don't think anyone would be as brave like her to do such things...i believed she's the most happiest girl on her wedding day of her life...

this morning, i woke up liao...but then i went back to sleep again haha..after that i got awakened by my mum when she just got back from temple...they went to rest la...i went to relax lor..after that changed and daddy drove us to AMK...cuz' we thought that the buffet over there was opened..but when we reached, it was kinda late..so we have to wait for dinner...didn't think of asking so ya just went to amk to kill some time till 5pm...went back to the same place...the person said that they only open at 6pm...sian la...so we head to the one near the science centre de lor...it was opened la!!! pay lor...110+ ba...for 4 persons...i pay la of course...haha..it's worth it just only for the deserts!! the rest cannot make it la...not really nice...i only took the black herbal soup...that's all...stayed there for about 2 hours..then went back lor...couldn't finish so much also la...here i am blogging lols..heard some bad news from DD...regards to the movie yesterday...about his friend...sigh...*prays*

yesterday was a blast...

in the morning, woke up that early to see the doctor...wasn't feeling well the past few days due to my giddiness..i finally found out what happened yesterday...doctor said that i have a blocked nose..when i'm perfectly normal...he asked whether if i had flu the past few days...i replied i didn't..then i recalled 3days back when we quarrelled and i started crying and stuff, i thought i was going to catch the flu bug...indeed, i was having flu after i got back..doctor mentioned that i have a blocked nose just that this has been on going and that i did not realise...and the giddiness was caused due to the blockage of nose and the pipe that led through the ears..that's why sometimes when i have giddy spells, that happens..the nose passage is being blocked due to flying la...the cabin is very dry and that causes my nose to be sensitive when time passes...inflamation he called it...sigh...i didn't know it was so worse...i thought it's just minor la...=( but luckily i found out earlier...DD asked me to see the doctor..if not i don't think i would just to save up...plus i really didn't want to get an MC...

yeah, after the doctor's i went to get breakfast for mummy and my brother...headed home and bathed...cabbed down to suntec..saw a red ferrari (omg!!) watched transformers haha..nice...

previously, we watched drag me to hell..nice show..sometime back la...never offend those gypsy man..lols..

he got the tickets at $2..it was this welfare thingy that allows this...haha...inclusive of drinks and snacks...haha..it's a deal..the show was exiciting...funny at the starting part...kinda touching..DD commented on how great i looked...it was the first time too that i wore something like that going out with him...i was so happy la...hee..hmm...had so much fun these few days...haha..alright man, time to take my medication!!! great day today too =D

pissed day at work

2009-06-25T22:32:00.004+08:00

i didn't had school that wed..was really good as i can have more rest...felt so bad that i didn't attend school on mon...i did 952 ma..was really tired...how can they plan us in such a way...i think they are making use of the time la...smart people...anyways, what a day today man...this junior S think she what eh...wth la...do you know it is rude to talk when people are talking..i was having a conversation, didn't even say sorry and just cut in...then nevermind, continue chatting despite my existence and wanting to finish up my talk...boarding, tell me to do things...nevermind, i was thinking it's just her being herself..so i let it be...after take off, everything ok...then the best part trash not much collection, toilets so so only...i think mostly i do de la...by rights, take your own initiative by moving to the front la instead of always me opting to standby in the FWD galley...diao...i mean i really don't mind..but i have things to do at the AFT lor and the AFT galley is in my charge...if anything happens, who's going to answer? you?? wth la...during transit in jakarta, she should just quickly do her security sweep, report and start collecting trash..no la, i think she did it on purpose so that she doesn't need to do AIC cuz' got us what...wth la...what kind of thinking is this..as if you're the senior here...no respect...then into SIN, same thing happens...i bth just shouted across and say don't talk at the front do AIC first done liao you can do anything...she showed me the infant seatbelt...please man, you see the seatbelt, take for CIC and just put it in the FWD or usually we hang at the seat...CIC will take de what...our normal procedures ma..wth..then nevermind, come to the back can still tell me oh, i help her retrieve the infant belt..i told her off lor..in a nice way la...then after that she did AIC la...like machiam not happy...heck la...as long as she do her work...talk and talk only...still can tell me that other seniors say i'm like her...wtf!!!! she's far from me lor..at least when i talk i do work, she doesn't!!! argh!! angry!!

after flight meet DD..so nice of him to buy dinner for me =D damn hungry man...mummy smsed me saying that she didn't see me for days...i thought she cared ended up, when she got home, all she did was nag cuz' of my room...i know it's really messy la..but can you just get off my back...i need to rest also lor...damn tired de lei...i'm not doing ground job...i promise after my last module i'll just throw whatever books that's here...making it spick and span ok?? make sure you won't nag...i saw sandy's room la..damn organised can!!! how i wish i can take a look at her room..she was taking some pictures ma...posted on blog, so i happen to see her room in one of the pictures...shit la, it's so organised...i think i better be like her...

sigh, come to think about work, why do those idiots love spreading rumors which are so not true!!! fuck them man!!! shit you!! argh!! can't you guys just mind your own bloodly business...nobody asks you to poke into ours...argh!!! sick and tired of work man!!! pay is already so miserable...just make my life easier by stopping all these nonsense can!!! pain in the ass man!!! argh!!!!

i too need to cut down on a lot of things and lead a healthy lifestyle!!
things to do!!!
1) stop clubbing (am trying to & am doing it)
2) go to gym and exercise
3) eat breakfast
4) DRINK MORE WATER (i realised i haven't been drinking water..that's why outbreaks are lurking on me!!)
5) do my own facial
6) cut down on spending too
7) pack my room AGAIN!!!
8) try to cut down on cup noodles (losing lotsa hair now)
9) get my driving license
10) MOST IMPORTANTLY!!!
after my bond, i'm going to get a good paying job of 3.5-4K and buy a car!! support my family!!

note to self
melissa, jiayou, you can do it!!! prove people things within the best of your abilities!! i believe i can and yes i can!!!

on my way home, i saw this bunch of kids playing...they were just so cute...was feeling down at DD's place..cuz' yea, due to some personal reasons we started quarreling again!!! kids can really make my day...even though i find their crying annoying just their smile, it has already made your day..it somehow warmed your heart and all your sorrows are drown by that smile...it's really amazing!!! don't know if you guys experience it before?? hee...

alright, i need to sleep..damn shag...am feeling sick soon..i know...don't know to take mc or not...jiayou...we shall see...

friends or "friends"???

2009-06-13T19:12:00.003+08:00

yesterday, many things happened...it made me realise who are my REAL FRIENDS!!!

seriously what does FRIENDS define...is it the definition of being used by another or is it really pure friends??

i've realised this important point in life....i was really glad that DD actually talked to me about it & i finally woke up...i started with what happened between "that clique"...then DD talked some sense into me...it's like god has sent an angel there for me telling me the right thing to do & to stop being NAIVE!!! finally i've woken up..being so happy that i didn't left him...thanks DD!!!

had a chat with my dear SISTAS!!!
i apologised to them...was really sorry & i really felt like a bitch la...didn't spend time with them & didn't even bother to call or ask how are they...sigh..i'm like a bitch la...initially i thought they will be mad at me for being like that..but no...i was really glad that they're really my TRUE FRIENDS..am so so happy that i've met friends like this..seriously!!! dex & san, no matter what next time, just tell me straight into my face...cuz' true friends doesn't lie...they're not afraid to tell the truth...so in any case i did something wrong or if i'm blinded by just that kinda people, PLEASE open my eyes for me...you guys can see the blind spot of mine whereas i can't & will be blinded...thank god i still have you guys & you guys didn't left me...i felt so relieved...but seriously when i'm out clubbing & stuff, i was really thinking about you two...really hope that you guys were there...=( all these has really ruined my life...but i'm glad that this is over..i just take it like a dream whether it's me that THEY enjoyed using or be it the SWEET TALKING...i don't mind...anyways, throughout my entire life of 21 years, i'm always being used by people...perhaps i'm gullible ba & i'm naive that's why people find me usable...but it's ok...blame it on the poor judgement i have on people...but god was kind enough to deliver two WONDERFUL friends & my SOUL MATE to help me go through this ordeal...am really glad they were there for me...*loves* thanks & sorry that i've been somewhat "MIA-ing" really sorry guys!!!
& if you guys are reading this, i'm terribly sorry...thanks for your forgiveness & still consider me as a part of the SISTAS clique =) love you all!!!

DD
thanks so much for being SO patient with me....i didn't really bothered to talk much about you in here cuz' i thought you were damn irritating, controlling my freedom & not letting me have it...but come to think of it, i felt really so bad la...am so f***ing SELFISH..i only cared about myself...wanting to have fun, neglected your presence, didn't want your accompany & felt bored just being with you...but then, just YESTERDAY, i didn't realise that i really had a wonderful SOUL MATE right by my side all this while...i didn't know that you've been putting up with my nonsense for about 1 1/2 months...you're really very patient...thanks so much DD!! you really understood me well..without your words which really knock some sense into me, i think i wouldn't be caring about my SISTAS's presence ba..i will still be enjoying & getting used by people....sigh...thanks a lot...the times we had, are really wonderful...i just hoped that time pass so slowly...suddenly, i miss you so so much...really!!!

finally i'm out of this ordeal...i just hope god can bless me with wonderful people around...i ever read this somewhere & it really is true

you don't need many friends but a few best friends that will really be best friends FOREVER..

it's indeed true!! hmm...felt so guilty but am thankful that this ended...sometimes in life, you really don't get what you wanted...but never mind...hee...

guess what, something bad befall onto those people...i don't know whether i'm thinking too much or what..but then, people who ill treats me or make use of me won't have a good ending...something bad will definitely befall them...I'M SERIOUS...this is not the first incident le..many of such occurrences happened before...it can't be just pure coincidences...wahaha...what i believed, WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND!!! wahahaa....
*i know i'm bad laughing at people who had something bad befall on them but go think about it, who's going to pity me when they make use of me...right? ;p haha..

something worth the read!!

2009-06-12T20:20:00.002+08:00

Interesting quote from the movie 'Why did I get married?'
In most cases, especially in relationships, you will only get 80% of what you NEED and you will hardly get the other 20% that you WANT in your relationship. There is always another person (man or women) that you will meet and that will offer you the other 20% which is lacking in your relationship that you WANT And believe me, 20% looks really good when you are not getting it at all in your current relationship.
But the problem is that you will always be tempted to leave that good 80% that you know you have, thinking that you will get something better with the other 20% that you WANT
But as reality has proven, in most cases, you will always end up with having the 20% that you WANT and loosing the 80% that you really NEED and that you already had.
Be careful in deciding between what you WANT and NEED in your life.

Adultery happens when you start looking for what you don't have. 'Wow, this girl in my office is a real looker. But it's not her Wynona Rider features that got me. I'm crazy about her because she's also understanding, intelligent, tender - so many things that my spouse is not'

Somewhere along the way, you'll find a woman or a man who will be more charming or sensitive. More alluring. More thoughtful. Richer. Have greater sex appeal. And you will find a woman or man who will need you and pursue you and go loco over you more than your spouse ever did.

Because no wife or husband is perfect. Because a spouse will only have 80% of what you're looking for. So adultery takes place when a husband or wife looks for the missing 20%. Let's say your wife is melancholic by nature.

You may find yourself drawn to the pretty clerk who has a cherry laugh no matter what she says: 'I broke my arm yesterday, Hahahaha . . ..'

Or because your wife is a homebody in slippers and pajamas, smelling of garlic and fish oil, you may fall for a fresh-smelling young sales representative that visits your office in a sharp black blazer, high heels, and a red pencil-cut skirt Or because your husband is the quiet type, your heart may skip a beat when you meet an old college flame who has the makings of a talk show host.

But wait! That's only 20% of what you don't have.

Don't throw away the 80% that you already have!

That's not all. Add to your spouse's 80% the 100% that represents all the years that you have been with each other. The storms you have weathered together. The unforgettable moments of sadness and joy as a couple. The many adjustments you have made to love the other. The wealth of memories that you've accumulated as lovers.

Adultery happens when you start looking for what you don't have.

But faithfulness happens when you start thanking God for what you already have.

But I'm not just talking about marriage.

I'm talking about life!

About your jobs.
About your friends.
About your children.
About your lifestyles.

Are you like the economy airline passenger that perennially peeks through the door of the first class cabin, obsessed with what he's missing? 'They have got more leg room! Oh my, their food is served in porcelain! Wow, their seats recline at an 80% angle and they've got personal videos!'

I guarantee you'll be miserable for the entire trip! Don't live your life like that. Forget about what the world says is first class. Do you know that there are many first class passengers who are miserable in first class -- because they are not riding in a private Lear Jet?

The main message???

If you start appreciating what you have right now, wherever you are, you are first class!

sigh, i really don't know what is wrong with me..

2009-06-10T22:18:00.004+08:00

today wasn't a great day for me...apart from being happy going to kak nonie's place to fix my nails, i wasn't happy at all...especially the first part of the day...sigh...i really don't know what i want la...sigh...am so so so disappointed with myself...not only YOU...me too do not understand myself...i really don't know what i want...perhaps i want to just have fun...but then again, how long can you endure all this shit...it's been shit for like the past month i guess or even longer...so i really don't know how long this will last...sigh...there's a limit to everyone's patience, i guess your time is almost up too...saw you flared up in the lift...was damn freaking afraid...i don't like it..was shivering like mad...for a moment, i thought i was with some mad guy...ended up, i decided to just go to any floor that will just cool me off to ease my shockness...you were smart, ran up all the way...which was really fast...i thought you took the lift...sigh...you found me...and you started again....

what can i do?? it was all my fault..it started all because of me...i couldn't blame you...i broke a promise...sigh..

i shall continue my story till i have the time to blog...as i got activated for a flight tomorrow at 455am reporting...sigh...if only they activated me at an earlier time...sigh...

went out with billy and gang last night after my flight...to this place at emerald hill...one of the pubs inside..it's damn nice...upload the pictures when i have the time...also after that, i got so enthusiastic about singing that fang & me decided to go to kbox at clementi...had lotsa fun...i specially love "sha gua" by wen lan...the mtv...really made fang & me cried...i got reminded of the past...took some pictures having crazy time lols...

alright then..good night people..

my FRENCH TWISTING DAY

2009-06-08T21:58:00.016+08:00

woots, today i've decided FINALLY not to be lazy and go to school...guess what?? as usual, i was late la...reached at 10am..but nevermind..wanted to take some notes cuz' i saw haslina's paper...she said it wasn't notes but some reference for test later...

me: oei don't lie la
haslina: serious..never lie
me: serious ah? then why are you laughing?? must be lying lor..
haslina: serious la!!!
me: (turning over to look at tara) ya, later got test..

shit lor, never study..never came for the past 3 lessons..and this was what i get...TEST!!! wth la...omg...was panicking....but luckily i came if not i doubt i'll be getting extra marks from...so took the test without even studying, just PURE knowledge on my own...if it's those short answer questions maybe can anyhow talk through but not all lor..some questions must study de..cuz' it's asking about terms...shit, till now, i know nuts about it..i think i need revision...need to get a HD in this module..shall work hard man...unlike my previous module, although PASS but then i felt i could've done better...cuz' i didn't attend lessons...yeah man, i can blame nobody but my own...

now damn good la, i never club for 1 whole week liao...been accompanying him as i promised...yea but then, it doesn't seem reciprocal..why i said so was probably cuz' when he did have the time, i was out with friends, went clubbing etc. so now, i can't complain or be sad too...i must understand his situation also..just like how i was when out with my friends...how i want others to treat me, i must first fulfill it before saying it...yeah, so i can't say or do anything but 3 words for myself: I DESERVE IT!! lols...

hmm..been doing nothing the whole day 2day..was watching BOYS OVER FLOWERS!!! woots!! i've finally finished the whole episode man...if you guys want the link, let me know...PM me in msn or tag me..it's with english subs..damn good lor...lols..i think give you whole day stay at home, you also can watch lols...oh yeah and i did my nose mask and face mask..while watching halfway waiting for it to get downloaded would be faster hee =D) finally wed's coming...(san ah san) lols...after the show, i decided to try my french twisting again...tried, but it wasn't as good as last night's sobx...cuz the back of my hair doesn't stand properly to make that luohan lols...hopefully tomorrow's hair will be good man..*prays*

below was my french twisting session last night wahahaha!!!

hmm...i don't know why but i've always got this kinda feeling that work is getting so much boring but cuz' of these.....

it made my working life was so much livelier...cam-whoring onboard and taking sceneries that i love...yeah man...this was taken while on our way to guangzhou in the morning on sunday =D although it was a shitty flight but sales not bad la...haha..hmm...tomorrow's another long day...but nevermind..no work no $$$...i shall take it that it's all those that's making me a little better in work...thinking of work makes me spend so little time with family, YOU and my friends...sigh...that 1 week of leave wasn't enough too...=(
jiayou MEL, it's another 11mths to go...after that...FREEDOM!!! woots!! lols...

i went to do my nails at kak nonie's...last week i think...nice lor...with fang also..i love hers...it was really sweet...mine's something similar to my past nails but this is so much nicer la...lols...am loving it...but so sad, my thumb got cracked so ended up can't get it done till wed...sobx...so i have to faec red nails for like a few days...probably a week...BORING!!!

i'm sorry that i've been neglecting you,
i didn't mean it...
perhaps i really just want to have fun..
as i've gotten sick of work..
so, just let me be...
once i get bored, i'll come back...
i'm sorry that you had to endure all these =(
SORRY!!!